National Lampoon's Gold Diggers Page #2
- PG-13
- Year:
- 2003
- 90 min
- 43 Views
I missed it by this much.
Patten, that son of a b*tch,
kept me in Newark
Distributing how to
avoid V.D. Pamphlets.
You're a sick, twisted freak!
A liar, and athief!
And you're mean.
Howdare you insult
aworld war ii veteran?
Who almost died for his
country ifhe would've fought.
Howmany times is someone
Gonna point a gun at me this week?
You'll pay forthis,
you son of a b*tch!
Yeah. that's what Hitler said.
Look where he is now--
Burnt up to his ass!
He needs so much therapy.
We're gonnawind up in one of
those state-run nursing homes
With one of those sadistic nurses
Giving us high colonicsjust for laughs.
Couldn't we take out
a second on the house?
We already took out a
second, athird, afourth.
Really?
I should've married Bruce
when I had the chance,
And you should've married Julian.
They were 93y-
We never should've
introduced them to each other.
I don't wanna end up in
one of those homes, Betty.
Who does?
Let's go home.
Stop!
Oh, god, did I hit another oat?
I've got it.
What?
The answerto all our problems.
Hey!
Which one of you scumbags
is Menhoffer and Smallwood?
Looks like your
luck's about to change.
We're being transferred
to a mental institution?
were dropped this morning.
ladies you guys tried to murder--
they left you this.
Did hejust say murder?
Oh...take awhiff, Len. Take awhiff.
Mmm. Smells like paper.
What's it say?
Oh, man...
Oh, mama...
You're not gonna believe this!
Lenny...
Say your good-byes to
these pathetic losers
'cause they just got cheated
out of the best two asses
In the whole damn prison.
Guard?
Guard?
Are you sure this is
the right address?
Yeah. Yeah, this is it, all right.
I got a bad feeling about this.
Hey, wait!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Where you goin'? Where you goin'?
Come on. Take your
skirt off, baby. Let's go.
Ifsjust two nice old ladies, huh?
Just two...filthy rich, nice old ladies.
I guess they did drop the charges.
That's right. And they
invited us to brunch.
You think to apologize?
It's the least they can do.
Bonjou r.
Uh, we're here to see Miss Mundt
And Miss Mundt.
Door's open, fellas.
Shake ifofiand come on in.
Shake what off? How'd you
like a punch in the mouth?
Go ahead.
You go ahead. Go ahead.
(this could be the start
of something big playing)
Oh, man...
Is this place cool orvvhat?
You're lookin'in someone's eyes
You suddenly realize
that this could be the
start of something big
Can you even begin to imagine
the kind of erotic
parties I could throw
In a joint like this?
Betty:
hey-You two little jailbirds.
Is that them?
I think so.
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"National Lampoon's Gold Diggers" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/national_lampoon's_gold_diggers_14601>.
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