Marvellous Page #2

you're still in the pink.

The years go by as swiftly as a wink.

Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself,

it's later than you think!

Is that a chaffinch?

What exactly is it that

you do up there, Neil?

At the university?

It is a chaffinch, you know.

It's got wing bars.

Neil Baldwin.

As much as I love birds, I will not be

knocked off-course by plumage talk.

What are you doing there, at Keele?

All sorts.

And what does it pay, this 'all sorts'?

Look at the birds of the air.

They neither sow, nor reap

nor gather into barns.

Yet your Heavenly Father feeds them.

When I started work, I read

my Bible every dinner break.

And they made fun of me.

They called me Holy Mary.

I could be a vicar,

then I'd be Holy Neil.

Is that why you don't want a normal job?

Because you're worried

they'll pick on you?

I like the Church of England.

I like performing.

I believe in God.

That does put you three up on most of the

Church of England clergy I've encountered.

But there are other

things you need, Neil.

Bifocals.

I was thinking qualifications.

- You alright, Nello?

- Hiya, Steve.

Wigan on Saturday!

Who's that?

Steve. He's a very good friend of mine.

You've never mentioned him before?

Well... I only met him yesterday.

Well, the good news is they are looking

for pot dippers at Susie Cooper's.

I used to work for Susie Cooper's.

I was the recipient of many a

compliment on my eye for colour.

I think our Neil's got the same.

Thank you, but it's not

what I'm looking for.

What are you looking for?

What would you like to do, Neil?

I'd like to manage Stoke City.

Or be a vicar. Either is fine.

I'm flexible.

Ok. And... what are you qualified to do?

I helped the students out at Keele.

And I'm a registered clown.

Are you indeed?

What have you gone and

brought that here for?

That's Nello.

Did you do this?

Just look at that paintwork!

Not a million miles away from ceramics.

That's right, he's a dab hand.

It's an egg of, with your make

up on, and it's registered.

You can sue anyone who

steals your make up.

I don't think Elaine wants

to hear about all that now.

And are there any openings

in the circus right now?

Not at the moment, no.

Charlie Cairoli's a very

good friend of mine.

I've got his number, if you'd like it.

Just say Neil said to ring him.

- I meant for you.

- 0272...

Neil!

Sorry. He does go off on

tangents now and then.

But you don't think

he has any vacancies?

For you.

No.

That's why I mentioned the

vicaring or football manager.

Doesn't have to be Stoke,

but I draw the line at Port Vale.

There are schemes to

help people into work

who otherwise might have...

difficulties.

Why are you telling me that?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes