Love the Coopers Page #2

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Ma'am, ma'am,

we need to detain you.

Give it to me.

Come on. Let's just make

life easier on everybody.

Spit it out.

Spit it out.

Give it to me.

[SINGING END OF JOY TO THE WORLD]

[BELL DINGING]

Merry Christmas.

Thank you so much.

Thank you. Best ever.

Thank you.

Our last number

is one of my aunt's favorites.

So, this is for you.

Aunt Fishy.

Rags! Get down, Rags.

Okay, then.

Ready, Mrs. Pinkins?

Hit it.

Joy to the world

The Lord has come

Let earth...

That's not the right lyric.

I'm sorry, Mitzi,

but I think it is.

From the top, please.

I'm not going to play to the wrong lyric.

[PLAYS DISCORDANT NOTE]

MAN:
Don't play it, Mitzi.

Mitzi's right.

It's not the right lyric.

Of course it's the lyric.

Joy to the world,

the Lord has come.

No, it's not the Lord has come,

like God reached orgasm. Please...

[PLAYS DISCORDANT CHORD]

What?

[STUTTERING]

Mitzi!

Well, so, Merry Christmas,

everyone.

I think that ends

our little program.

SAM:
Thank you so much.

You've been a wonderful audience.

We will be back next year.

[CHUCKLING]

But will they?

Yeah, you don't have to worry about

that after tonight, that's for sure.

You don't have to say it

like you're never

going to see me again,

Charlotte. I'm not dying.

No. But we are.

Hey, Tinkerbell.

NARRATOR:
Aware of the growing distance

between her parents,

Eleanor Cooper found herself

drawn to public displays of affection.

She remembered a time in her life

she had not been so guarded.

[GIGGLING]

This is quite fun.

If you show me yours,

I'll show you mine.

Okay?

[CHUCKUNG]

Oh.

NARRATOR:
She remembered a moment

she'd wished she could forget,

the day a stolen kiss

caught her eye.

She recognized that kiss.

It was her fianc's.

Eleanor was shattered.

Alas, she could never climb

the wall that built up around her heart.

Still, Eleanor secretly

searched out strangers' faces

for the moment they flickered

with unguarded emotion.

Can I have a Dirty Martini,

shaken over ice, please?

I'd be honored

to buy you a drink.

I can pay for my own drink,

thank you.

Not you.

Thanks.

I'll have a Dirty Martini,

shaken over ice.

[GUITAR MUSIC PLAYING]

Put the presents

for the kids in the trunk.

And I'll get

your tip next time.

No problem.

And take the Internet,

it's faster.

You got it, Aunt Fishy.

My nephew

called me that.

He and wife

are going to Africa

and I'm babysitting the kids.

I'm your nephew.

Can you remember my name?

Um...

Sam.

Yes. I'm Sam,

that's great.

[LAUGHING]

I know your name.

I'm not a zombie.

You better step on it.

You're going to

miss your plane.

Aunt Fishy,

that was 30 years ago.

Really?

Well, how was the trip?

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