Love Bite Page #3

a sexual advice column?

Go on, Spikey boy.

Hello, girls.

Try and edge towards them. Go on.

My hand's stuck.

Get off me, Spike.

You're cramping my style.

Thanks a bunch.

Do you wanna hold my hand?

- Perfect.

- Yeah, pie puke. Nasty.

I'd love to work here.

It's like a chick magnet.

I'm holding out for a slot on the bins.

I've always wanted to ride a crusher.

- You've gotta love those perks.

- What perks?

Glow bib.

What is it about those men

that women find so irresistible?

- Girls love a bit of bump and grind.

- Bump and grind.

I'm riding with you, Kev.

I'm a nervous passenger.

Back out slowly.

You do understand

the idea of bumper cars?

Slow down.

- Ladies.

- What's that smell?

I don't know.

Kev, are you really gonna work

at the pie factory?

- Jamie, the pie factory's a babe pit.

- Says who?

Pie folk.

There you go, a redhead.

Red on her head, fire in bed.

If you don't chat up a girl

in 30 seconds, do you stop breathing?

It's a natural urge, Jamie.

The itch you have to scratch, right?

The itch happens after.

I've seen the girls you've been with.

Listen up. New number one

on my wish list, right.

Twins, right, and me with a strap-on worn

back to whatsit, both at the same time.

I call it a sister seesaw.

Spike)'-

We're gonna get you.

Mate, your hair stinks of puke.

Right. Check it, Bru.

A big lump at the back there, Spike.

Bruno, get down the offie

and get some more beers, will you?

- Why should I go?

- 'Cause you're our booze b*tch.

As soon as you've dunked

your doughnut, you can stop.

You wait till I'm on the bins.

Then you'll see who the girls go for.

- Yeah, not you, you big virganus.

- Yeah, Spike, like you're not one too.

Does your cyber cherry count?

Right, is it out yet?

- The good news is the sick is out.

- But you're now covered in sh*t.

Juliana, it's Jamie.

- Where's Juliana?

- Checked out.

What are you doing in her room?

Wanted an en suite bath.

Why are you dressed like a terrorist?

I work with bees.

Bzz.

Juliana, I'm surprised you checked out.

I hope everything's alright.

Let me know. Best wishes, Jamie.

Kind regards.

Yours sincerely.

J. And a kiss.

No kiss.

Smiley.

Yuk!

That vintage fashion shop

you recommended, it's fabulous.

I bought the most beautiful

satin corset.

So if you've any more ideas...

Well, I'll definitely bear you in mind...

bear it in mind...

remember you in it... remember it.

Sorry for my sudden departure.

My boss wanted me to check out

some accommodations.

Kind of have to jump when she says,

sucks, but that's the gig.

Here's my new address.

Go on then.

You go.

- What are they doing?

- Dunno.

Get up.

Let me in or I'll have you thrown out.

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