Loser Page #2
- I could tell them how pigheaded you are.
- You are so condescending!
If I'm not smart enough for you,
then go for your professor girlfriends!
Your capacity to edit out ideas
you don't like makes...
...TASS look like
an Al Goldstein publication.
You think I don't know anything.
I think you know how to walk
in a pair of platform Mary Janes.
I think you know how to style your hair
with an eggbeater.
Save a little time by layering on two,
three weeks' worth of eyeliner.
- God, I hate you.
- You don't hate me.
- Say you don't hate me.
- Let me go! Yes, I do.
- Let me go. Stop it!
- Say you don't hate me!
- Hi, Ma.
- Hi, Rho.
- Hi, Brenda.
- Hi, Bren.
Hi there, son-in-law.
We're ordering 'za, slap me a big head.
I've got the descending dollars
meal plan so I already ate at the union.
I have $120, but it has to last
till the end of this...
Sorry.
Chris.
You think you could turn it down a skosh?
- "A skosh"? What the hell is that?
- Just a little.
I'm going to tell you something,
and this is for your own good, okay?
No one likes you.
They don't?
No.
- You didn't notice?
- Well, no.
- What did I do? Why doesn't anybody...
- I don't know.
You talk weird, your clothes are lame.
You never come in with a sixer.
You're just a wormy little guy who sits
in his room and studies. It's so gay.
But I'm on a Regents Scholarship.
If I do badly, they'll kick me out.
And I'm not like you guys.
You can just drink all night and still pass.
You must be really intelligent.
No, believe me. We're not.
You just got to play it smart.
Take a few Mickeys.
- "Mickeys"?
- Mickey Mouse. Cake. Easy classes.
I have to take my prerequisites.
I mean, take whatever you want.
Just try not to be so much like...
...you.
Well, you know what I mean.
Yeah, I guess so.
Just trying to help.
Chris.
- What's a sixer?
- It's a six-pack.
Beer. Thanks.
Hi, Rho. Hi, Bren.
Excuse me.
Come here, please.
What can I get you?
Your pantyhose.
How about a screwdriver?
They're really good here.
I'll give you $50 for them.
You can get three for $10 at Wal-Mart.
$60.
Please order a drink.
Just get a beer and I'll think about it.
Okay.
Honey, do you have anything smaller?
We can't change this yet.
Thanks.
- Why'd you do that?
- Get small bills while they're sober.
When drunk, they won't know what
they gave you. Supplement your tips.
- You mean give them the wrong change?
- They're donating to your college fund.
- Yeah, but that's stealing.
- You're funny.
- You are such a little sh*t.
- Annie, get back here!
You want everyone to think
you're Mr. Stud.
I had to tell them.
- You did not!
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"Loser" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/loser_12832>.
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