Little Saigon Page #3

---

cops to know where I really was.

And where were you?

I was home alone.

But if those cops thought

I couldn't back up my alibi

they could make my life a livin' hell.

You know I've been down that road before.

I was involved in a real

estate con once in Miami.

I lost my license.

I mean, I was innocent,

of course, you know,

but I lost it anyway.

It was just a real unjust thing.

That's what I like about you, Jack.

You're always one step ahead.

Yeah, that's what I like

about myself too, you know?

Can we, can we, ma'am?

Excuse me, can we get a little service?

Please, please.

Thank you.

You know, you got a good

head on your shoulders, Tuan.

Thanks, Jack.

I think it's time that maybe you took on

even greater responsibilities

at Jack Mackie Real Estate.

Really?

Man, that, that's great.

What do you have in mind for me?

Well, lately I've been

checking out obituaries

of prominent people and

going to their funerals.

I pretend I knew the dead guy.

It's a great way to network.

I don't get it.

If the guy's already dead,

isn't it already too late to network?

No, no, no, no, on.

It's the best possible time.

See, chances are the guy's old lady

is thinkin' about sellin'

the big empty house

and movin' to some retirement community.

And who better to get the listing

than the dead guy's

old buddy, Jack Mackie?

(chuckles) That's like scary good.

Oh, yeah.

Has it paid off yet?

Sure, I got a listing this morning.

You got a listing the

same day as the funeral?

Sure.

Well, I mean I had to

do a little extra, uh,

shall we say, schmoozin'. (laughs)

- Brilliant.

- But, yeah, yeah.

[Woman] Drop your pants.

What?

Grief makes a person very horny.

It's a medical fact.

Now do you want that listing

or don't you?

You know at my real estate

office I advertise free donuts.

Well, somebody's gotta

pay for those damn donuts.

And now I think it's time

to start doing Vietnamese funerals.

I guess this is where I come in.

Bingo.

You still speak Vietnamese, right?

I mean I've heard you speak some of it.

Yeah, sure, well, conversational.

Yeah, what are you, like, what, half?

Yeah.

Yeah, but the half that

you are can speak it?

Sure.

Really?

Well, good, now order

us some food, will ya?

So now what do we do?

Well, we just follow the

procession, see where they go.

Hey, give me that guy's

background information again, will ya?

Dr. Quan Le, military doctor,

captain in the South Vietnamese Army.

Left Saigon when it fell in '75.

And how did he die?

He was murdered in his hair salon.

Oh, yeah, I heard about that guy.

It was in our building on the first floor,

that real expensive-lookin' salon.

That's why I never went in there.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes