Liberal Arts Page #2
when he was here,
he'd run out of the room crying.
That's probably true.
Well, what were you like
when you were here?
I was very handsome, wasn't I?
Am I remembering that correctly?
No, I don't remember that.
But what I do remember
is you being a real jerk
to your parents
on graduation weekend.
He didn't want to leave.
It's true.
And I blamed my parents,
weirdly, all four of them.
Like it was their fault
college was ending.
Don't do that to us.
- No, I won't.
- She says that now.
So your parents told me
you're in the improv group?
Yeah.
How's that?
It's the best.
I love it.
What do you love about it?
Um, I think I love
how terrifying it is
and how you have to say "yes"
to everything.
Uh, sorry, what does that mean?
It's, like, the only rule
of improv.
You can never say "no."
You have to say "yes"
and then add something.
Like, uh-like, look.
Um, okay, Mom, you and I
have been wandering
in the desert for days,
and we're about to die, okay?
Okay.
Okay, and I say,
"Hand me that lemonade."
So hand me that lemonade.
Jesus, Susan, hand her
the goddamn lemonade.
Never mind.
Jesse, hand me that lemonade.
Thank you.
Mmm.
Sweet, just the way I like it.
I nailed this.
It doesn't make sense.
We're in the desert.
lemonade?
So what was your major?
I was English
with a minor in history,
just to make sure
I was fully unemployable.
- Right.
- What about you?
Drama.
I mean, not officially yet,
'cause my dad's not totally
thrilled with the idea,
so maybe also art history?
I'm just happy you go to class
occasionally.
improvised all day long.
Nope.
I mean, I do, I guess.
Have you ever thought
about that?
About what?
How everything in life
is basically improvised?
There's no script.
We're just making this up
as we go.
That's true.
So yeah.
Well, improv is deep, man.
- Well, we're about to head out.
- Oh.
- Pleasure to meet you, Jesse.
- Yeah, yeah, you too.
Take care.
Bye.
So I'll-
I'll see you around, I guess.
- Yeah, yeah, see you around.
- Okay.
It was nice to meet you.
Yeah, you too.
- See you later.
- Okay, bye.
Enjoy college.
You wearing a tie tonight?
Huh?
What can you say, really?
People get up and say
all this great stuff about you.
You know, I'm thinking,
"Who in the hell
are they talking about?"
It's just,
where does the time go?
This seems impossible.
37 years.
There comes a time
in a man's life
when it hurts to do the math.
You know, I worry
that I've been here so long
that I'll be lousy
being anyplace else.
Oh, well, I guess I'll find out
very shortly.
Um, hey, thanks for the chicken.
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"Liberal Arts" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 17 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/liberal_arts_12513>.
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