Last Vegas Page #2
to waste a lot of time, considering.
Yeah. Yeah.
Uh, excuse me one minute,
please.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where...?
Where'd you get that bottle?
Ran out of Scotch, found this
in the back of that cabinet.
No, no, no. You...
You don't want to open that.
No, no.
Hello?
Hey, is this the bionic man?
Hey, Billy, how you doing?
What's going on?
- What are you whispering about?
I'm, uh, just going through someone
named Abraham Rosenbaum's
medicine cabinet.
He's got some very deadly sh*t here.
- Hang on, let me patch in Archie.
- Okay.
...all these guys?
Are you insane?
- At least I have a husband.
- Oh, whatev...
- Clayton residence.
- How you feeling, Arch?
Billy, hey, hey!
How you doing?
I'm just sitting here watching
this Housewives thing.
Horrible people, horrible.
- Hey, Arch.
- Hey, Sam.
- How's the titanium hip, man?
- No, the hip was last year.
Uh, it's my knee.
It's great, yeah.
I'm thinking about
having my balls done next.
All right, listen, guys. I got something
important here, all right?
- Oh, sh*t, Billy.
- Heart or cancer?
Prostate? What?
Why every time the phone rings,
you think somebody's dying?
I live in Florida now.
Usually, when the phone rings,
- somebody is dying.
- No, I'm getting married.
- What?
- Wow.
To that lady who's half your age?
- She's almost 32.
- I have a hemorrhoid that's almost 32.
Now, look, Archie,
by the time she's my age,
okay, I'll be...
- Dead. You'll be dead, Billy.
- Billy, Billy, Billy.
You've got your whole
what's left of your life ahead of you.
I mean, you know. Look at Archie.
He's divorced and miserable.
I've been married almost
40 years,
and I wish I was as miserable
as Archie.
Can you guys maybe give me
a little support as my dearest friends?
- How about it?
- Sorry, you're right, sorry.
Yes, good... It's good news.
We're happy
you're getting married.
Right. So...?
So how'd you pop the question?
You remember my friend Ronnie,
the guy I worked with,
uh, who trained me?
- Yeah, yeah, love that guy.
- Good guy.
Yeah, well, he died. I...
I proposed at the funeral.
- I got nothing. Arch?
- Nada.
So, Lisa, she doesn't
want a big wedding or anything,
so we're gonna get, uh, married
in Vegas this weekend.
So we're gonna have
- No, no, come on, forget it.
- No, no, no, yes, we are.
- We are.
- It's your first wedding.
You threw all of our bachelor parties
for us.
- Two for me.
- Yeah, but we got no time.
- We're getting married on Sunday.
- Aw, Billy.
So we... No, it's fine.
We fly in on Friday,
Saturday we give... We give you
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"Last Vegas" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/last_vegas_12297>.
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