Keanu Page #2

Synopsis: Rell's life is changed forever when a cute kitten comes to his door, and he names it Keanu. Unfortunately, one weekend later, Keanu is abducted by persons unknown. Now Rell and his cousin, Clarence, are men on a mission to find Keanu against the odds. Unfortunately, those odds prove to be perilously high as they find Keanu in the care of the ruthless gangster, Cheddar, and he will only part with him for a price. Now for that cute kitten, these two middle class bumblers find themselves neck deep in a dangerous alien world of drugs and gang violence with only their desperate audacity, creativity and sheer dumb luck giving them a chance to survive.
Genre: Action, Comedy
Director(s): Peter Atencio
Production: Warner Bros. Pictures
  5 wins & 5 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.3
Metacritic:
63
Rotten Tomatoes:
78%
R
Year:
2016
100 min
Website
1,166 Views


And at the same time,

I need you to clean up

your little area while I'm gone.

Is that cool?

- I'll see you soon.

- Okay. Good.

Uh, say goodbye.

You're coming with me.

Right, yeah, of course. I'm sorry.

Uh, goodbye, Keanu.

Cool.

Now, we'll talk about it later.

Okay. Bye. Hey.

Get that b*tch!

Get her! Get her!

Get her! Yeah!

I'm psyched for this movie, man.

Is that a photo of you and Maisie?

Yeah. I mean, it was.

That was amazing!

Movie of the year!

That is, like, the best Liam Neesons movie

I've ever seen in my life.

- Best Liam Neesons movie ever.

- Hands down.

I'm, like, jacked up from that movie!

- All right, settle down. Settle down.

- Whoo!

What a way to start a weekend,

you know what I mean?

That's good, because now,

I've got all that "doing me"

stuff out of the way,

and now tomorrow, I can mow the lawn,

- I can get my bills done.

- Hey. Hey.

You don't think that going and seeing

a Liam Neesons movie with me right now

counts towards you doing you.

- What? That is me doing me.

- No.

I wanted to see that movie.

Hannah would never go see that with me.

It's just the beginning.

You have something else planned

for the rest of the weekend?

We're gonna go to my house, right now.

We're gonna smoke some weed.

No, Rell. Hannah would...

Will love it. Hannah will love it.

You don't know my wife very well.

I know her well enough

to know that she's a woman,

and women like bad boys.

Who are you to give me this advice?

Are you bad?

I mean, I'm not saying I roll up,

f***in' with my AK, poppin' fools.

No, you're not rolling up,

because that would require

a driver's license,

- which you, as a grown man, do not have.

- Fair enough.

So, there will be

no rolling up with AK's or anything else.

But I don't have a driver's license

'cause I'm from New York City.

NYC, baby.

Where, yeah, the dudes

that kicked my ass...

- Yes?

- ...were bigger than the dudes

that kicked your ass, motherf***er.

I'm from Detroit.

Detroit public school system.

Impossible. Guaranteed

the guys who kicked my ass

were twice as big and scary as

the guys who kicked your ass.

- No way.

- Guaranteed.

- Fine. So...

- Guaranteed.

You have to get the last one.

Do it. I don't care.

I'm not getting into a...

No way.

What makes you think

I can't handle my business?

I've got it all on lock.

I'm good to go, drawg.

I'm good to go, dude.

George Michael is holding it down.

- See, you just grooved on it.

- I'm not saying...

You just went...

I'm not saying it's not a good song.

I'm saying we should be listening to this.

What are you doing? You all right?

What is that?

Yeah. Roll on, po-po.

I'm sorry, no.

You don't get to say,

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Jordan Peele

Jordan Haworth Peele (born February 21, 1979)[2] is an American actor, comedian, writer, producer, and director. more…

All Jordan Peele scripts | Jordan Peele Scripts

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Keanu" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/keanu_11645>.

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