Jayson Bend: Queen and Country Page #2

It's the act of lifting.

It's in the bending of the knees.

I'll do it.

Put that box down, Sergeant!

You're not an orderly.

Right.

Lifting is not specified.

Implied, Sergeant Major.

Implied.

Those boxes can be lifted

without bending the knees

and I instruct you to do so.

Refusing to obey an order

is a court martial offence!

Fire!

Fire!

Fire!

- Don't you hate being hemmed in?

- No, I love it.

I could stomach it if it wasn't for Bradley.

- We can't do much about that.

- Yes, we can.

- What?

- We set him up.

Get rid of him. Bump him off.

You haven't killed that other sergeant yet.

- Good point. Let's find some girls.

- You're still a virgin, aren't you?

- No, no, no, I'm not.

- Yes, you are.

No, I'm not.

I've kissed loads of girls.

There. There.

Sorry-

Shh.

Forget the unobtainable

and take what's on offer.

We're in.

- Oh.

- It was lovely to see you.

Hello. Percy.

- Sophie.

- Peggy.

Hi.

You coming? We're leaving.

There was such pain in her eyes, Percy.

I think she needs help.

Hold on.

Don't get into that sh*t.

We're the ones who need help.

Come on.

Bill, this is the beautiful Sophie

and her lovely friend Peggy.

Hello.

Are you shy, Bill?

Mmm-mmm.

Yes, you are. I just made you blush.

- He's still a virgin.

- No, I'm not.

- Yes, you are.

- No, I'm not. Shut up.

Come on!

We have to be in by 10:00!

That's our dorm!

Come on, girls. Faster.

Come along now, girls. Inside, quickly.

How fast can you run?

- You two! Come on! Late again!

- Sorry, Matron.

- Sorry, Matron.

- Go away!

- Come along...

- Come on. Come on. Come on.

Come on!

I can't see sh*t. Higher!

Come on!

Wow.

We're talking maybe 20 student nurses

in varying states of undress.

You should see it.

Tits flying everywhere.

Two nurses dancing in the nude.

Wow.

Come on, then, my turn.

Higher...

Higher... That's it.

Good.

I see no tits.

It's Sophie.

Wow. I see what you mean.

What?

What do you mean,

"You see what I mean?"

Your girl, Sophie.

The curve of that breast.

The pink nipple.

Pressed against the window.

You lying ponce.

Yeah, right.

Sophie.

Don't let them get to you, Percy.

They won't break me.

We'll stick together.

Like sh*t to a blanket.

Who's this malingerer?

- What's your name, soldier?

- Private Redmond, sir.

- And why are you not saluting the officer?

- Excused saluting, sir. Hernia.

Required to keep hand in pocket

to keep it in, sir.

I know your type, Redmond.

You're a Skiver.

Because you're an old sweat,

you think you have the measure of the Army.

Well, now you've me to contend with.

I'll leave this in your hands, RSM.

Right, this one.

Every sergeant is a suspect

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