Synopsis: A once-great silent film director, unable to make the transition to the new talkies, lives as a near-hermit in his Hollywood home, making cheap, silent sex films, and suffering in the knowledge of his sexual impotence, and apathetic about the plans to demolish his home to make way for a motorway. His producer and his producer's girlfriend come by to see how he is doing (and to supply heroin to the actress as her payment). The girlfriend stays to watch them filming, and is deeply impressed by his methods. When the actress goes to the bathroom, and dies there of an overdose, the girlfriend takes her place in the film. Then the producer returns...
Genre: Comedy, Drama
Rotten Tomatoes:
117 min

"Gower Gulch?" I says, "Chuck you, Farley!

"He's working at home,

and he don't even have to leave his house. "

That's beautiful. That's really terrific.

That's really smart, Harlene.

I want to thank you a lot.

Natch. You been good to me, kid.

You seen my lucky necktie?

Yes, it's right where you left it yesterday.

Listen, you didn't happen to...

tell him where I was living

or my address or anything?

Sure, I did.

This Clark Gable wanted to know.

He said he'd like to come out

and talk to you sometime.

- It was all a real enema to him.

- Enigma.

- He loved ghost stories.

- Ghost stories?

Why, you, kiddo. You're the ghost story.

- Give me a hand.

- You don't think von Stroheim is going to...

Come over here? What the hell for?

He's working, ain't he?

- What if this kid comes over?

- This Clark Gable?

You can brush him. He's just a kid.

- Listen, I think I must tell you that you're-

- Using too much of this stuff, Harlene.

- Go on off your high horse.

- I just can't help thinking about Wally Reid.

You, too? He was a swell kid.

We used to have a lot of laughs,

me and him.

And Jack Pickford?

We used to

piss the hell out of that bunch of...

stuffed shirts at his sister's dump.

- That Wally was a caution.

- Yeah, died in his own vomit...

in a padded cell, good-looking guy like that.

- He didn't look too good in the end.

- No.

Me and Jackie paid him a visit,

snuck him a shot.

Hold it steady. Okay.

That's the ticket.

How long till

Rex, the Wonder Dog, gets here?

He will be a little late.

He's got a funeral this morning...

but we can get in a couple of inserts.

A couple inserts?

I'm Mabel if you're able!

Cut it out, Harlene.

Come on, honey. You give up too easy,

that's your problem.

Come on, Harlene.

I ain't kidding you, honey.

Rate this script:(0.00 / 0 votes)

John Byrum

John Byrum (born March 14, 1947) is an American film director and writer known for The Razor's Edge, Heart Beat, Duets and Inserts. more…

All John Byrum scripts | John Byrum Scripts

FAVORITE (0 fans)

Submitted on August 05, 2018


Translate and read this script in other languages:

Select another language:

  • - Select -
  • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
  • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
  • Español (Spanish)
  • Esperanto (Esperanto)
  • 日本語 (Japanese)
  • Português (Portuguese)
  • Deutsch (German)
  • العربية (Arabic)
  • Français (French)
  • Русский (Russian)
  • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
  • 한국어 (Korean)
  • עברית (Hebrew)
  • Gaeilge (Irish)
  • Українська (Ukrainian)
  • اردو (Urdu)
  • Magyar (Hungarian)
  • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
  • Indonesia (Indonesian)
  • Italiano (Italian)
  • தமிழ் (Tamil)
  • Türkçe (Turkish)
  • తెలుగు (Telugu)
  • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
  • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
  • Čeština (Czech)
  • Polski (Polish)
  • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
  • Românește (Romanian)
  • Nederlands (Dutch)
  • Ελληνικά (Greek)
  • Latinum (Latin)
  • Svenska (Swedish)
  • Dansk (Danish)
  • Suomi (Finnish)
  • فارسی (Persian)
  • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
  • հայերեն (Armenian)
  • Norsk (Norwegian)
  • English (English)

Discuss this Inserts script with the community:


Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:


"Inserts" STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 6 Aug. 2020. <>.

We need you!

Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

Watch the movie trailer


The Marketplace:

Sell your Script !

Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web!

The Studio:

ScreenWriting Tool

Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.

Thanks for your vote! We truly appreciate your support.