In Bruges Page #2

Don't Look Now.

Not a pastiche, but a...

A 'homage' is too strong.

A 'nod of the head'?

Wow, your English is very good.

A lot of midgets

tend to kill themselves.

A disproportionate amount.

Herv Villechaize,

off of Fantasy Island.

I think somebody

off The Time Bandits.

I suppose they must

get really sad about, like,

being really little and that.

People looking at them

and laughing at them.

Calling them names.

You know, 'shortarse.'

There's another famous

midget I'm missing,

but I can't remember.

It's not the R2-D2 man.

No, he's still going.

I hope your midget doesn't kill himself.

Your dream sequence will be f***ed.

He doesn't like being called a midget.

He prefers 'dwarf.'

Well, this is exactly my point!

People go around calling you a midget

when you want to be called a dwarf.

Of course you're

gonna blow your head off!

- My name's Ray. What's yours?

- Chloe.

How did you get past

the security man?

Getting past security men,

it's sort of my job.

You're a shoplifter?

(CHUCKLES) No, not a shoplifter.

It's a good joke, though.

No.

I'll tell you what I am

at dinner tomorrow night.

(CHUCKLING)

F***.

How f***ing cool.

Mr. Blakely?

- Yes. No, Mr. Cranham.

- No. Yes. Mr. Blakely. Yes.

You have a message.

Sh*t!

HARRY:
Number one, why aren't you

in when I f***ing told you to be in?

Number two, why doesn't this hotel

have phones with f***ing voicemail

and not I have to leave messages

with the f***ing receptionist?

Number three, you better f***ing be in

tomorrow night when I f***ing call again

or there'll be f***ing Hell to pay,

I'm f***ing telling you, Harry.

(DOOR LOCK TURNING)

Would you turn

the f***ing light off!

Sorry, Ken.

Keep the f***ing noise down!

Someone's in a mood.

(SOFTLY) You'll never guess what.

Will you shut your f***ing mouth,

please, and go to sleep?

Oh, sorry.

Except I've gotta take me

contact lenses out.

Altogether,

I had

five pints of beer

and six bottles.

No. Six pints of beer

and seven bottles.

And you know what?

I'm not even pissed!

You'll never guess what, Ken.

- Ken, you'll never guess what.

- What?

Got a date for tomorrow night.

I'm very happy for you.

With a girl.

Can you turn

the light off, please?

Only been in Bruges one day, got a date

with a girl in the film business,

the Belgian film business.

They're doing a film about a midget.

Miss?

Marie?

Sorry about the message last night.

The man who left it is a bit of a...

Well, he's a bit of a...

Cock?

Yes. He's a bit of a cock.

Morning.

Harry called last night.

We missed him.

Jeez, he swears a lot, doesn't he?

We're staying in tonight.

Whatever happens.

Hmm.

Except...

Hmm.

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