I Am a Sex Addict Page #2

was the true love of my life.

But then a month later,

Caroline flew to the States to see me,

and it was then that the trouble started.

You see,

Anna became jealous of Caroline

and insisted that I choose between them.

I didn't want to choose between them.

I wanted to be able to see them both.

But then Anna got

a summer internship in New York,

and Caroline and I ended up

spending the summer together.

Which is why when her visa expired.

I offered to marry her

so that she could stay in the States.

Now, I should probably explain

that I wasn't exactly the marrying type.

In fact, I was totally against marriage.

You see, I had grown up

during the Vietnam War

and I saw marriage as pat

of the same capitalist system

that had produced

the genocide in Vietnam.

(explosions)

(screaming)

But I was also influenced

by performance at...

(screaming)

... and by the idea of life itself

as a kind of performance piece.

And to me the institution of marriage

was so inherently absurd

that I tried to subvert it

by treating it as performance art.

I do.

Except that the joke,

as it turned out, was on me.

Because when Anna found out

that I had gotten married to Caroline,

she didn't take it so well.

(phone slams)

And then I did something

incredibly dumb.

You see, Caroline and I were

about to run out of money...

... and the idea of having to get a job was,

in my mind, a fate worse than death.

The only occupation I was interested in

was that of famous filmmaker.

But the few experimental films

that I had made

hadn't exactly been greeted

with enthusiasm by the film world.

(indistinct)

To remedy this situation,

I had recently written a script

about the French poet Arthur Rimbaud

which I was convinced

would revolutionize cinema...

... and which Caroline insisted it would

be easy to raise money for in France.

It will be easy to raise money

for this in France.

But moving to France

turned out to be a disaster.

Most of the film producers I approached

wouldn't even talk to me.

The few that did

just told me that I was nobody.

Meanwhile, my relationship

with Caroline had started to unravel.

(crying)

Caroline was insanely jealous of Anna

and would cry hysterically

whenever I would write her a letter

or talk to her on the phone.

Hi, how are you doing?

I was starting to feel trapped,

and it was hard not to blame Caroline

for having gotten in the way

of my relationship with Anna.

And then one day,

I got a letter from Anna

saying that she was going

to be in Amsterdam

and asking

if I would like to meet her there.

(crying)

I was ecstatic.

I felt that I was finally being given a chance

to get back together with Anna.

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