Husbands Beware

Synopsis: To inherit a fortune, voice teacher Shemp must marry before six o'clock, but no girl will accept his proposal. Finally one of his repulsive students agrees to marry him, just in the nick of time. When the rest of the prospective brides hear about the inheritance, they show up at the ceremony and a free for all ensues. Shemp marries his student before the deadline, and then finds out that there is no inheritance. Moe and Larry have tricked him into marriage as revenge for their marrying his shrewish sisters.
Genre: Comedy, Short
 
IMDB:
7.4
NOT RATED
Year:
1956
16 min
3 Views

I do.

And I pronounce you men and wives.

Congratulations.

And now, if you could excuse me,

I have a hurry to testify

at a divorce. Goodbye.

- Bye!

- Bye.

We'll never forget you,

boy. If it wasn't for you,

we would never marry

your lovely sisters.

Oh, I'm a cupid. Anyway,

better you should support them than I.

Well, now for our nuptial kiss.

What's the idea?

That's just to show you

who'll gonna be boss around.

- Como here.

- Now wait a minute...

Now, get into the kitchen

and roast the turkey.

Yeah, make some muffins and coffee!

Wait a minute! We

don't know how to cook!

It's time you learn.

That's what husbands

are for! Now get going!

Wait a minute, wait a

minute, wait a minute!

- But girls, I didn't...

- Shut up!

Now go on, pick off the

feathers of that turkey

while I study how to cook it.

- Why you...!

- Wait a minute, Moe!

Do I like that a David Crockett?

No, come on, peel that turkey!

There must be an easier way

to get the feathers off that turkey.

I get an idea! Wait!

That's over lighty? Right, sir!

Hey!

I better get busy with this turkey.

Gee fellas, I didn't

know my sisters are so .

To prove it I'll help you.

Yeah? Well, get over there

and make some muffins and coffee.

- Go ahead!

- Alright.

Now get back to business here.

Poor turkey, I cut it!

Wait a minute, I'll

get the stephic pencil.

Watch your "stephic".

See now... muffins, muffins... muffins.

Three spoons of flour.

One... two... three.

And one egg.

Now I add some milk.

Now a pinch of baking powder,

no, a spoon of baking powder.

Oh, I'll make it rich.

Now I'll mix well.

Please, make like this.

Thank you.

There we are.

Did you have the shave lotion?

Righto!

Powder!

See you later, fellas.

Let's see. "In order to brown the turkey

you paint it with salad oil."

Salad oil, let see, maybe it's in here.

No.

Salad oil! Well!

There we are. Round down, kid!

There we are!

Okay.

Here we are. Let's go.

Open up the stove, boy!

Open that door.

- So already lit!

- Now roast it!

This bird will be out of this world.

Yeah, too good for those

elephants we married.

Hey, it's on fire! Do something!

Step aside!

Good work, kid.

- Delicious turkey!

- Nice hot muffins!

And I made it myself.

Oh, that's a cheap modern furniture.

Soap!

Trying to poison us, hein?

You, you no good assasins!

Wait a minute, wait a...!

You want poison us, will you?

But I can explain...

- You too!

- What do you want...?

Marry us with those two no goods!

Why you...! Get out of our house!

Boy, if that's married life

I don't want any part of

it. I'll never get marry.

But you hooked us alright.

And we'll get even with you!

Hey, wait a minute, Shemp,

we gonna get the music class.

That's enough. That's enough.

We've done enough for today.

You might hurt your voice.

You know, bend it, crack

it or break it or something.

Professor, you're so considerate.

I'm just crazy about you!

Don't forget, we've got

another lesson Tuesday.

Gargle with old razor blades.

All right, Professor.

I know you wouldn't want

anything to happen to my throat.

Except to have somebody cut it.

How'd you like to be

married to a dame like that?

Don't even say that.

I oughta...

You oughta what?

I oughta be a little more careful.

Shut up and listen.

Do you remember your Uncle Caleb?

Do I? Why, that old tightwad.

He'd steal flies from a blind spider.

- But, Shemp, he's...

- He's a louse and a weasel.

Yeah? Well, he just died

and left you $500,000.

Just like that old skinflint.

Five hundred thousand bucks?

But there's one little catch.

Rate this script:(0.00 / 0 votes)

Felix Adler

 more…

All Felix Adler scripts | Felix Adler Scripts

FAVORITE (0 fans)

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Translation

Translate and read this script in other languages:

Select another language:

  • - Select -
  • Chinese - Simplified 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
  • Chinese - Traditional 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
  • Spanish Español (Spanish)
  • Esperanto Esperanto (Esperanto)
  • Japanese 日本語 (Japanese)
  • Portuguese Português (Portuguese)
  • German Deutsch (German)
  • Arabic العربية (Arabic)
  • French Français (French)
  • Russian Русский (Russian)
  • Kannada ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
  • Korean 한국어 (Korean)
  • Hebrew עברית (Hebrew)
  • Ukrainian Український (Ukrainian)
  • Urdu اردو (Urdu)
  • Hungarian Magyar (Hungarian)
  • Hindi मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
  • Indonesian Indonesia (Indonesian)
  • Italian Italiano (Italian)
  • Tamil தமிழ் (Tamil)
  • Turkish Türkçe (Turkish)
  • Telugu తెలుగు (Telugu)
  • Thai ภาษาไทย (Thai)
  • Vietnamese Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
  • Czech Čeština (Czech)
  • Polish Polski (Polish)
  • Indonesian Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
  • Romanian Românește (Romanian)
  • Dutch Nederlands (Dutch)
  • Greek Ελληνικά (Greek)
  • Latin Latinum (Latin)
  • Swedish Svenska (Swedish)
  • Danish Dansk (Danish)
  • Finnish Suomi (Finnish)
  • Persian فارسی (Persian)
  • Yiddish ייִדיש (Yiddish)
  • Armenian հայերեն (Armenian)
  • Norwegian Norsk (Norwegian)
  • English English (English)

Discuss this Husbands Beware script with the community:

Citation

Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:

Style:MLAChicagoAPA

"Husbands Beware" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2019. Web. 6 Dec. 2019. <https://www.scripts.com/script/husbands_beware_10413>.

We need you!

Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

Watch the movie trailer

Husbands Beware

The Marketplace:

Sell your Script !

Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web!


The Studio:

ScreenWriting Tool

Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.


Thanks for your vote! We truly appreciate your support.