How High Page #2

Yo, Silas!

You better take

those college exams!

Look at Jamal.

He's a good boy, huh?

Good boy, my ass.

Ask her why I had to cancel

my nail appointment...

to go and pick him up

in the precinct last week.

Momma, they lyin'.

They lyin'?

- They found the weed on you,

didn't they?

- It wasn't mine.

Then what is this

that I found in your bedroom?

Hello.

Ma, it is a lamp.

And this is where

you turn it on now.

Excuse me?

Head.

Now, where did I go wrong

with your ass?

You're gonna have to take

that THC test and get

into a four-year college,

or I'm just gonna cut you off

from this family.

Baby, you are the first member

of this family to go to college,

but six years

at a two-year community college

is not what I had in mind.

Tell the truth.

Baby, I got a dream...

that one day I can put

your college diploma...

here under my Jesus,

who's master of this house,

next to your brother's

prison-issued

barber certificate...

and your sister's

weave master degree.

Now don't disappoint me,

you weed smokin',

three-day-wearin'

nasty ass.

Just like your father.

Ma,

why you always gotta

be talkin' to me like that

in front of company?

- These b*tches ain't nobody.

- Oh!

- Now go warm me up

some Porkchops-O-Chunky.

- Is that all, Momma?

- Wash your nasty ass.

- Is that all, Momma?

I really don't know

what you came here for

You the man.

Round and round we go

Consider your bags

outside the door

What's up, baby?

Oh, hell no!

I didn't know

you had dreads.

And what is that?

Brother just got extensions

put in today. They tight, huh?

Where?

Between your eyes?

What the hell is that?

It's the mark of Buddha.

It's the skid mark

of Buddha!

Looks like he took a dump

in the middle of your face.

I don't think

this is gonna work out.

Hold on, now!

Why you doin' this?

I'm in the Field of Dreams

and Dances with Wolves.

Nigga, you are a wolf.

Chocolate diva!

Nubian goddess!

I'm gonna take you off

my buddy list, b*tch!

I hope you get a virus--

you and your computer!

If you build it, they will come.

What you mean, If you

build it, they gonna come?

Who's gonna come

to a f***in' cornfield?

Who gonna cut the grass?

I know you don't expect me

to sell no peanuts out this, b*tch.

Sh*t remind me of slavery,

Roots and sh*t.

I don't play this, man.

Hey, what was that?

Annie! Crazy ho!

Only way I'm comin'

is if you got some females

and some chronic.

Then we all gonna be comin'.

That voice just now,

what was it?

- We didn't hear anything.

- You got some nice titties,

dog. Word.

What titties? What?

Okay, you must've heard that.

It's a good baseball field, Ray.

It's kinda pretty, isnt it?

Uh, yeah.

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