Home Run Page #2

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since James died overseas,

but she says she's glad

to be back in Okmulgee.

What do we say we go get you a salad?

A salad?

Yeah.

No cheese.

Good morning,

Mr. Popular.

He's cute.

You've been suspended

for eight weeks.

Well, good morning to

you, too, Miss Sunshine.

Come here. I want to

show you something.

"Corey Brand

injures bat boy. "

A million hits.

Already.

It was an accident.

Can we talk about this later, please?

"Boozes it up in Vegas. " 364,908

hits. That was a good night.

"Drunk at a Strip Club. "

217,402 hits.

You're a disaster. Yeah,

well, I'm a 3-27 career hitter.

"Cory Brand DUl Caught on

Tape". Over a million hits.

Yeah, it looks a little bad when

you put them all together, all right?

But there were a lot of

sober moments in between them.

You still got

that condo in Miami?

Floor is a little warped.

Popped the water bed.

Here's what

you're going to do.

You're going

to fly to Tulsa

and drive down

to Okmulgee.

I'm not going to

Okmulgee. Oh, yes, you are.

You're going to Okmulgee

and make nice with the kid.

And then I'll arrange

a very public photo op.

The kid has a name. It's Carlos.

Carlos is going to get a bag

full of crap from the Grizzlies,

and a photo op

with a celebrity.

Then go chill on the beach in Miami

for eight weeks. Yeah, lucky me.

Plus, the Grizzlies want proof that

you're attending a 12-step program.

12-step? They want you out of sight

untiI you've completed

eight weeks.

And last but not least,

you're writing a check

for $10,000

for Young Life,

for that homer

you screwed up.

I'll see you in Tulsa.

Ladies and gentleman, welcome

to Tulsa International Airport.

Local time is 3:
34 and the

temperature is 98 degrees.

Hey, you didn't have to waste so

much money renting such a fancy car.

Don't worry about it.

How do you even get in this

thing? It's got no handles.

We're here to help

farm boy.

Oh, man, Mr. Arby's

forgot my curly fries.

Hey, don't make me

go back in there, okay?

That guys nearly cried

when I signed his hat.

He did not. A grown

man. There were tears.

Right.

Hey, don't forget the

Arby's sauce. I got it.

Oh, these

are so good.

Come on, let's go.

Thank you, sir.

You satisfied?

CarefuI.

Were you drinking

on the plane?

Let's see what

this baby can do, huh?

No, let's not.

Let's.

Would you please

slow down?

Woo-hoo.

Cory, look out.

So, my Little League team is

playing the Chiefs this week.

I'm going to start reading

for the Bulldogs.

We're going to run

them into the ground.

They're not going to

know what hit them.

Yeah, I love running

them into the ground.

Hey, go to the car. I need

to talk to this hot rod.

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