Home Movie Page #3

'Trust me,'

the dragon answered,

'I'm one of you.'

'Oh, yeah?

Prove it,' they said.

'Take off your mask.'

The dragon knew that

that was something that he couldn't do.

'What I can do,' he said,

'is talk like you.

I can walk like you.

Shoot, I can even

dance like you.'

'Do it,' said the children.

And, indeed,

the dragon walked,

talked and danced just like

he was one of them.

And the children

were so convinced

that they invited him to sing

their songs with them.

They invited him

to play in their games.

And when the bell rang

for lunch,

they invited him

inside to eat with them.

'Thanks,' said the dragon,

'but I prefer to eat outside.'

'Outside? ' says the children.

'But whatever will you eat? '

The dragon responded, 'You.'

And with that,

the dragon took off

his paper-bag mask,

revealing

the two hideous heads.

The children

started to scream,

but their screams were soon swallowed

inside the dragon's stomach."

That was perhaps the most

vastly inappropriate

fairy tale I've ever heard.

Hon, it's an allegory

for, you know,

"Don't trust strangers."

Good night, Steven.

Good night, Lou.

Good night, Nikolai...

commie bastard.

Hello, my name

is Dr. Clare Poe.

It is the 10th

of November, 2006.

This is video diary number one.

Patient's name:
Billy Tomlinson, 11,

diagnosed with prodromal VEOS

at the Children's Hospital

in Philadelphia,

where I am currently chief resident

of the child psychiatry unit.

Patient meets all diagnostic criteria,

including disorganized speech,

alogia, catatonic features

and persistent delusions,

with no fewer than three hallucinatory

episodes in the past three months,

in which Billy claimed

there was, quote,

"a man made of nails"

living under his bed.

10mg Abilify,

10mg loxapine.

In less than a week,

this binary treatment

vanquished Billy's delusions,

sending this "man made of nails"

back to whatever synapse

misfiring he came from.

Scheduled appointment,

including blood work,

for next Tuesday, the 14th.

Hi. It's November 18th.

Hi. It's November 18th.

I'm your host David Poe,

and this is "America's Funniest,

Most Embarrassing

Home Videos."

Today the kids have

their Thanksgiving Day party at school.

Mom's dressed them as something.

We're gonna find out what.

You guys look

so cute, I'm gonna vomit.

The follies of youth

are fast forgotten, not to worry.

Unless, of course,

Dad happens to be filming them.

Listen to you.

Honey, did you make

your own lunch?

- I'm sorry, you look great.

- They look great!

Fantastic, absolutely.

What did you make?

That's... come on, please...

Give them a break.

Did you make bologna?

No? PB&J?

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