Home Movie Page #2
- R
- Year:
- 2008
- 77 min
- 201 Views
- I'm not an elitist.
- You're an elitist.
Kiss me, elitist.
Mmm, this cheese isn't bad.
- Are you seducing me?
- Huh-uh, I would never do such a thing.
Well, um, it's too bad for you.
I can't have sex right now
because I have a lot of work to do.
- You always have work to do.
- Yeah, so we have money to spend.
- Right.
- # Money to spend. #
Aw.
Isn't this how
the Paris Hilton video got started?
No, I think it was...
Oh, you... bastard!
Oh, where's my towel?!
Oh!
You are dead!
- You are so bad.
- Bad...
do you mean like
"bad good" or "bad bad"?
I mean like bad,
nasty, evil bad.
You're supposed to be
a pastor, you know.
Yeah, I'm Lutheran,
not a Catholic.
Well, I am a doctor,
not a whore.
Say happy anniversary
- to the camera, will you?
- No.
So we have something
to remember when we're old,
decrepit and farting
all over each other.
We're not gonna be farting
all over each other. That's disgusting!
We're gonna be farting
all over each other.
We're gonna die
in a conflagration of farts.
- Yeah, your farts.
- Somebody's gonna light a match
and we're gonna go...
Not my farts.
Come on, say happy anniversary
to the camera for posterity's sake.
Happy anniversary. And now
you can take the camera out of here
because it is supposed to be for my work
because I've spent a lot of money on it.
I thought it was supposed
to be soft-core porn?
No?
- I can't believe...
- I can't believe how sexy you are.
Take your clothes off.
Get in here.
Is that the dog?
- Why does he always do this?
- Hegel, fermez la bouche.
David,
please, with the camera.
I feel like I'm on
"The Real World" or something.
"The Real World"?
Where's Emily?
Oh, isn't that
the most precious thing?
It's not precious. It's weird.
It's not weird...
the two of them in bed together?
They're getting too old for this.
It's the cutest thing
I've ever seen.
"The Story
of the Dragon and the Paper Bag,"
by Micky Powell.
"Once upon a time,
in a land far far away,
there lived the most hideous
two-headed dragon
in all of history.
And this dragon had
this dream of eating
all the boys
and all the girls in town.
In fact,
'twas more than a dream...
'twas a plan.
On Halloween next,
when all the boys and all the girls
wear their paper-bag masks
to school,
the dragon decided that he was going
to wear his own paper-bag mask.
And, thus disguised,
he set forth
for the schoolyard.
On the schoolyard,
the schoolkids were surprised
by the sight
of their new student.
'You're too tall,' they said.
'You have two heads,'
said another child.
'You can't be one of us.
You must be the dragon.'
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"Home Movie" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/home_movie_10096>.
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