Hit by Lightning Page #2
I'm hit by lightning or
killed by a terrorist.
Oh, hey, Kings won.
Three goals and two assists,
you're on fire.
NHL.com has pop-up ads for
"E-Happily"?
What the hell. They NEVER have
before...
You have no
responses.
Yeah..
Hey, man.
Hey, Jorge. I was just checking
the... the hockey scores, what's up?
Ahh, I'm gonna need next Saturday off too.
I'm getting married.
What?
Yeah, I know, my mother's been
on my case.
You're twenty-seven, you bum,
what are you waiting for?
Twenty-seven really isn't that
old.
So can I have Saturday off or
what?
No.
What?
Oh, uh, I'm sorry. I, I meant
"yes." Of course... of course...
Jorge...
Where, where did you meet her?
Who?
E-Happily, man. It's
surprisingly effective.
You have one
response.
You found your wife?
Yep. Last night.
didn't have to go anywhere.
Found her on my computer.
Oh... what porn site?
Wasn't a porn sit... "E-Happily!"
I...joined it last week.
What do you mean, you joined it?
Ah, I don't think I was being
cryptic.
I joined E-Happily last week. To
meet my soulmate.
And it worked.
Poor, sweet, crazy bastard you.
I've never been more sane.
This woman's perfect for me.
Perfect!
Oh, she loves all the same
things I do,
hockey, cats, Albert Brooks
movies,
spooning after sex...
Alright whatever, what does she
look like?
I don't know... and you should
see the e-mails she wrote to me.
Funny, smart, sweet...
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Hold on, just back up, hold the phone.
What do you mean, you don't know
what she looks like?
She didn't post a picture for
some reason.
Oh, that's a real puzzler.
It's 'cause she's a dude,
she's a dude Ricky or looks like a dude.
No...
Listen hoggy dog. There's only that
woman wouldn't post a picture?
'Cause, god bless her, she's
obviously hideous.
Look, there's a million reasons
she wouldn't put up a picture.
No, no... there's one, one...
she looks like "Shrek."
What if she does? Did you learn
anything from that movie?
It's what's inside that counts.
Yeah in fairy tales, you idiot,
not real life!
Her name is Danita. What a
beautiful name.
before.
"Danita..."
You sure it isn't Dan
Ita? Like that's her last Ita,
like Dan Ita
Can't you be happy for me?
Alright common You haven't even
met this person!
I am, tomorrow. I'm meeting her
at the Black Cat for drinks.
Look don't do this okay please
Ricky, don't do this.
I have to, Seth.
Danita is my destiny.
Okay...
might want to bring a condom for
Dan just in case.
Shut up.
What the hell is that in your
head?
What are you doing here?!
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"Hit by Lightning" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 18 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/hit_by_lightning_10014>.
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