Hacks Page #3

Synopsis: Once the tea girl Kate Loy is now the ruthless editor of scurrilous red top the Sunday Comet,owned by greedy Australian media magnate Stanhope Feast. The paper will stop at nothing for its ...
 
IMDB:
6.7
Year:
2012
140 Views


What?

You photographed a married

couple having sex.

But they've got different surnames!

How very unfair of them(!)

Come on, there must be some way

we can use them?

The photos are great!

"Celebrity has sex with wife."

Oh, actually, that is unusual!

You're f***ing enjoying this,

aren't you?

No, Oliver, I... Oh, I am, actually!

Good morning, Miss Loy.

Zoe, f***ing wink at me again,

and I'll destroy your career,

your health and your sanity.

Sorry!

I know, I know. Don't cry.

Oh, message.

Rav says the fat man told him the

cops have arrested Charlie Bollocks.

Kate.

Have you not heard of e-mail?

No, I know you've got the

bollocks to print this...

Oh, great! The story

that got Kenny fired.

I can see what everyone's

doing on their computer!

This story stands up!

Not without a phone!

Oliver's watching Billie Piper

naked on YouTube.

Come on! I was nice when you were

the squirt bringing the coffee!

Why not hack phones

like everyone else?

Cos...

They're celebs! Anyone with

a publicist has got it coming!

It's not that!

It's too easy.

Any bastard could do it.

The kids out there don't learn

the real skills any more.

They don't get proper stories!

You run a course in going through

dustbins and impersonating undertakers!

I gave the body back, didn't I?

All I'm saying...

F*** it! Ray, you're fired!

What? Goodbye. Rav!

I've got a story for you.

"Crimewatch couple's agony

over internet sex photos."

Ooh! What internet sex..?

These ones.

Stick them on the internet.

'Don't tell anybody... '

' 'I tried not to cry.

'I didn't want that to be

the last thing you heard.'

They didn't run the story

on Sunday,

so looks like we might have

got away with it.

'I said can we hold a funeral,

'but they said,

"No, not without a body."'

'I've booked us a room

at the usual place... '

I brainstormed the Channel 100

takeover with Trent.

Enzyme milkshake, baby. He thought it

should be me that made the announcement.

Tony and Cherie called.

Do we still want to go to the movie?

Oh, Jesus Christ!

Tell them I've had a stroke.

I say you have jet lag.

Dad, have you revisited my thoughts

about you slowing down a bit?

About maybe pencilling in

a timetable...

Connor, I've decided on a timetable.

Oh, great.

I'm going to slow down a bit

after I'm dead.

Anything else you want to discuss?

He's gay, he's younger than

his partner, he's in a boat.

What's wrong with it.

Toyboy Ahoy In Gay Away Day.

I think that's offensive.

You, Oliver Bland, think

something's offensive?

Oh, I get it.

He's one of your celebrity pals.

No. We are mates, yes, but...

Byron. You're gay.

You don't find it offensive, do you?

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Guy Jenkin

Guy Jenkin is a British film director and comedy writer who is best known for working together with Andy Hamilton on sitcoms and comedies such as Drop the Dead Donkey (1990-1998), Outnumbered (2007-2014), and Ballot Monkeys (2015). He wrote the 2002 satirical comedy Jeffrey Archer: The Truth, with Damian Lewis portraying Jeffrey Archer, and the 2003 drama film The Sleeping Dictionary, starring Jessica Alba. Jenkin also contributed to the popular 2006-2007 BBC series Life On Mars, writing the sixth episode of the second series about heroin in 1973 and the Asian community. The episode explores racism at the time. Jenkin is married to Bernadette Davis, the creator and writer of Some Girls. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Hacks" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/hacks_9468>.

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