Gulliver's Travels Page #2

to brag about my more literarian side.

These samples are terrific.

And you exhibit such variety.

This one about Oaxaca feels really classic,

like it came straight out of Frommer's...

whereas the description

of Barcelona is all...

sassy.

It's like I'm reading Time Out.

Yeah.

I think I have the perfect fluff piece

to start you off with.

There's a guy down in Bermuda who claims

he has the secret to the Bermuda Triangle.

He's either crazy or he's trying

to bilk tourists. But I figure...

it could be a fun way in...

to explore Bermuda

and the smaller islands around it.

You do have boat experience, don't you?

I'm a... boat... man.

I'm a boatman.

Okay, good...

because I have to be honest,

it was hard to find someone to do this.

You have to be at sea for three weeks,

completely off the grid.

That's okay with you, right?

Good, because I thought...

I was going to have to do it

and I get super seasick. It's crazy.

So, what do you say?

It's not a big story, but it's a start.

So, the Bermuda Triangle, huh?

Everything I need

to know is in here?

It is. Your contact's been arranged...

and there's a boat waiting for you.

Yeah.

That's me!

Okay, precious cargo! No, no, no!

That was close.

All you chickens,

get out of the road, man!

I don't know about this, Hank.

I mean, are you sure this is safe?

All this Bermuda Triangle talk

is just to sell T-shirts to tourists.

It makes for good stories...

if you want to skeet-skeet

with the girls on the mainland.

This is your boat.

Knotfersail.

They really went pun-tastic

on that boat.

The dock master's really into puns.

He believes it keeps the pirates away.

Ship Happens.

This is you, and the dot

is your destination.

You just follow that dot,

and you'll find yourself in a triangle.

- In the Bermuda Triangle?

- Yeah.

And then to come home,

you say I turn this knob...

and I follow the dot back home?

Yeah.

- Easy.

- Easy.

- Done.

- Done.

I've got it.

I am fine.

Fine.

It's not moving.

Okay, where's the clutch?

And as you go out to the ocean water...

towards the Bermuda Triangle...

there's reflections everywhere.

I should've brought some sunglasses.

I am as hungry as a horse.

I could eat 1,000 cheeseburgers.

Okay.

Quitting time.

Yeah.

How to build your own robot?

Yeah, that's going to happen.

Darcy.

Cheeseburger.

Darcy.

Cheeseburger.

No!

Safety! Okay.

Rubber ducky.

No!

Floaties! Floatie one.

Floatie leg, floatie left...

floatie right, floatie head.

I am safe!

There is no...

9-1-1.

Oh, no.

Oh, God, help me!

I'm paralyzed from the neck down.

What's that crawling on me?

Not fire ants.

Please don't be fire ants.

I am General Edward Edwardian,

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