Good Deeds

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My name is Wesley Deeds the Third.

I grew up fifth generation

Ivy League graduate.

I can tell you my pedigree

all the way back to the tribe

that my greatest grandfather came from.

I was born into privilege,

groomed by my father to be a businessman,

to take over his company.

Groomed by my mother to be a gentleman.

I was told where to stand and how to dress,

how to cut my hair,

and what I would be doing

for the rest of my life

from the time that I was five years old.

And right now, I seem to be on track.

Whose track, I don't really know.

By this time,

my mother thought I should be married,

and according to my life schedule,

it's four months away.

I'll be marrying her, Natalie.

She's amazing.

We 're perfect together.

With a life like mine,

you'd think that I wake up happy every day,

but I don't.

My life is perfect.

But I often wonder, am

I living my own life,

or the life that I've been told to live?

This tie is too dark.

I think this tie is too dark.

Green.

Green. Green's better.

Maria forgot to put the shoe stretchers

in my shoes.

Babe, you know Maria forgot to

put my shoe stretchers in again?

- Really?

- Yeah.

I'll talk to her.

I'll tell you who it won't be,

Deeds Incorporated.

According to the rumor mill,

the software giant...

No, I've been listening to the radio.

Yeah.

No, no, no.

Listen, this is what I want you to do.

Just get everybody, set

up a conference call,

I will figure it out when I get there.

John, don't panic. It's all fine.

I'm looking at the paper now.

Okay. Thanks.

Hello.

Yeah, I have a morning meeting.

Showing the Jones apartment. Right.

Hey, can you tell Jeffrey

to have something cool for kids?

- What do kids like?

- Toys, honey.

Toys. Toys.

Bye. See you soon.

What would you like for breakfast?

Egg whites and oatmeal.

Egg whites and oatmeal will be fine.

And don't forget the grapefruit juice.

- And grapefruit juice?

- Right here.

- I don't care, Walter!

- Fine.

It doesn't matter to me! Neither do you!

Get out of here, then!

You know what? Karma's a b*tch!

And you're gonna get yours.

Walter!

You're crazy! You're a drunkard!

And you're a nobody!

- Trick.

- Oh, yeah, I'm a trick?

Don't look at me like that, just drive!

- Walter...

- Just drive!

Walter, how long before

you get your driver's license back?

You tired of driving me already?

You know what, I'll get a driver.

Don't you worry about me. I don't need you.

I didn't say I was tired of driving you.

I just asked you a question, that's all.

I don't know.

Mom won't speak to the judge.

- Would you do it?

- No!

Come on. Please!

Why can't you just get your license back

just like everybody else

who's had several DUIs?

You know, Dad would've done it for me.

'Cause he loved me.

We all love you, okay?

Well, Mom has a weird way of showing it.

She's been through a lot with you, man,

she's tired.

Get a tie out of the glove box.

We're seeing her for lunch.

Hell, no. Hell, no! I ain't going

Take me home, Wesley!

We're going to work,

then we're going to lunch.

Okay, just shut up!

I'll have it later, when I get off.

Lindsey, you know, the owner could

have the sheriff here today.

Come on, Milton. Just

take one for the team.

She's already filed the writ of eviction.

- Will you just give me a couple hours?

- Give me a break.

Look, I'm saying I'll have it.

I just need...

I'll have it today. All right?

Just tell her that.

That's all I'm asking, just tell her that.

Are we gonna get put out?

I don't want you worrying about that.

How much more do we need?

Ariel, stop it.

Come on, let's get your shoes on.

We're gonna make a stop

before you get to school.

We can expect light onshore wind

coupled with an upper level

low pressure drop off the coast

that will deepen the marine layer

across the coastline today...

We got a spot!

You know what? Watch what you're doing!

You trying to kill me? Damn!

Lady! Listen. Hey, hey.

Look, you're in my parking spot.

Oh, really. Well, you know what?

I'll just be one second.

- Lady, I got a conference call I gotta get to...

- I haven't got time for this right now!

Excuse me? "I have a conference call"?

That ain't how you stop

no black woman in her tracks.

- Walter, don't you...

- This how you stop a woman. Hey, b*tch!

Walter!

Who the hell are you calling "b*tch"?

The man said move your car!

- Hey! Hey!

- Walter!

That mouth of yours

is gonna get you killed, man.

Hey, Kat. Yeah, man, this is Walt Deeds.

Listen, I need a tow truck in the parking lot.

Some lady parked in my brother's spot.

Thanks.

This woman left her child in the car, man.

So? That car and that kid

are about to get towed, man.

Just leave your car here,

Kat'll come down and he'll park it.

Call April, have her transfer

the conference call down to the car, okay?

You want to sit here and wait?

Yeah, April?

I don't talk to strangers.

Wes wants the conference call

transferred to the car.

Thank you.

See? Little black girl

already got attitude.

And that little black girl gonna turn into

an even bigger damn black girl

with even bigger attitude, man!

Just get in the car, Walter.

Just get in the car, please.

You know I don't have a cell phone.

It's hard as hell trying to find a payphone

and you're not answering the phone.

Inventory.

Can I get my check?

And then I have to go someplace,

just for a couple of hours.

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