Galaxy Quest Page #2

FRED:

You were the, uh... Wait I'll think of it...

GWEN:

I repeated the computer. "It's getting hotter, Commander!" "The

ship is disintegrating, Commander!" Nothing I did EVER affected

the plot, not ONCE! Nothing I did was ever taken seriously!

TOMMY:

Excuse me. I'm an African American playing a nine year old

Malaysian named Laredo. HELLO!

Suddenly the rear stage doors open and JASON NESMITH ("The

Commander") strolls in, all exuberance and charm.

JASON:

My friends, your Commander has arrived!... Am I too late for

Alexander's panic attack?...(looks at Alex) Apparently so.

(inspects a mole on Alex's neck) That's irregular, you should

have it looked at. (looks at Fred's paper) Lakers are HOT.

Speaking of which... Gwen, you look spectacular.

(they all glare at him)

Oh, what did I do now?

5CONVENTION STAGE On the stage, Guy continues to stall...

GUY:

... Sure, the rocks looked hollow and the sets moved when anyone

humped into them... But we didn't care...

FILM CLIPS are projected behind him: On an alien planet THE

Commander carries the LIMP BODY OF HIS ADVISOR, LAZARUS, ray guns

erupting around him... On the command deck the crew fights a

space battle with crack precision TEAMWORK...

GUY (CONTINUED)

....For those four seasons from '79 to '82 we the viewers

developed the same affection for the crew of the NSEA PROTECTOR

that the crew had for each other... These weren't just

adventurers exploring space, these were friends...

6BACKSTAGE - The others surround JASON, fighting.

TOMMY:

You said we do appearances together, or not at all.'

JASON:

I didn't say that. I said "wouldn't it be great if we could

always, work together." That's what I said.

GWEN:

Unbelievable.

TOMMY:

You are so full of sh*t

JASON:

A few fans built a little set in their garage. . I come in for

an hour at most. It's a nothing.

5/4/99(GOLDENROD)

GWEN:

How much of a nothing? Not enough to split five ways kind of a

nothing?

JASON:

What do you want me to say, Gwen?... They wanted the Commander.

Suddenly bright light streams in. They all turn to see ALEXANDER

skulking out the exit. A beat, then they all run to catch

Alexander, TACKLING HIM.

7ONSTAGE -

Guy gets a thumbs up cue from a stagehand and begins to introduce

the cast, to the delight of the applauding FANS.

GUY:

Okay, here we go... Let's hear a warm welcome for crack

gunner/navigator. Laredo, Tommy Webber!

Tommy comes bounding out with a big smile, his hair mussed.

Behind him is a film clip of young LAREDO in action.

TOMMY (FILM CLIP) AS LAREDO

"If it's got quantum rockets, I can fly

it."

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