Futurama: The Beast With A Billion Backs Page #2
Listen up, everyone.
I know you've all been extremely worried
about the cosmic anomaly.
The what? Oh, right.
But there's good news.
We're all going to learn more about it
at a scientific conference.
like a city made of marshmallow.
Welcome. I am the pickled head
of Stephen Hawking on a way-cool rocket.
Black hole Hawking?
Wow, if I knew I was going to meet you,
I would have done something
with my hair.
You should have.
In conclusion, I understand
nothing about the anomaly,
even after cashing the huge check I got
I know this anomaly is terrifying.
But as scientists, is it not our sworn duty
to seek out knowledge,
even at the cost of our very lives?
No.
I say we must mount an expedition
to the anomaly forthwith.
I agree.
Wernstrom!
Professor Farnsworth is correct.
Don't listen to that crackpot!
But I'm agreeing with you.
I'll make you eat those words, you moron!
I volunteer to lead the expedition.
I have a squad of graduate students
eager to risk their lives
for a letter of recommendation.
My team is twice as qualified
and three times as expendable.
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
Oh, tough talk for someone
with only one Fields Medal.
Ooh!
Ooh!
Wernstrom, I ought to...
I didn't know I could do that.
Now quiet down
and settle this like men of science.
Very well.
Let Deathball begin!
- Go, Planet Express!
- Go even more, my team!
Leela, header!
Ow!
Bust those balls!
Hooray! We're equally good!
Come on, Bender! Your grandmother
could push harder than that!
No crap.
My grandmother was a bulldozer.
And thus metal man defeated meat man.
The end.
Come here, winner!
Come here, loser!
Colleen, what are you doing?
My face is over here.
This is my boyfriend, silly!
- I thought I was your boyfriend.
- You are.
- Well, how can you have two boyfriends?
- Oh, I don't. I have five.
Fry, meet Chu, Bolt, Ndulu, and Shlomo.
- Greetings.
- Pleasure.
But... But...
Shlomo and Ndulu
will help you move your stuff
into my apartment tonight.
Welcome to the relationship, buddy!
Hmm?
There's my butterscotch.
Congratulations, deathballers!
We've won the right
to explore the anomaly!
What? I thought
I was playing for my freedom!
No.
Now, I've often said "good news"
when sending you
on a mission of extreme danger.
So when I say this anomaly is dangerous,
you can imagine
how dangerous I really think it is.
Not dangerous at all?
- Actually, quite dangerous indeed.
- That is quite dangerous!
Indeed. Now stop shilly-shallying!
Prep the ship and line up
for your preflight coffee enemas!
Warning. The enema you are about
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"Futurama: The Beast With A Billion Backs" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 24 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/futurama:_the_beast_with_a_billion_backs_8715>.
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