Futurama: Bender's Big Score Page #2

---

to get depressed.

Please enter credit card number.

Is cash okay?

Porn. Porn. Free porn.

I find that rather hard to believe.

''Top-quality.''

I'm waiting for porn over here.

Oh, yeah, come on, baby.

Friends, friends!

His Majesty Prince Adisaraki O. Zoidberg

of Nigeria died.

That's so sad.

When will those antidepressants get here?

Wait, there's more.

According to this e-mail,

I, Zoidberg, am his next of kin.

Once I wire some good-faith money

to an overseas bank account,

I'll inherit his kingdom,

his canoe, and his plump young wife.

You dumb stumps.

Don't you realize you're being scammed?

That is low, Hermes.

Just because you don't have a body,

you don't want anyone else

to be prince of Nigeria.

Well, try and stop me

from wiring that money.

What's going on here?

According to

my illegal key logging software,

you've all been giving out

personal information over the Internet.

If Hermes were here, he'd fire you all.

- I am here.

- Quiet, you.

In his absence, I'm calling

a mandatory company security seminar.

To the mandatorium!

Now, it's not hard to spot

a phony Internet come-on.

''Get rich quick x7 q''? Phony.

''Lose weight with space parasites''?

Phony.

What's this?

I've won the Spanish National Lottery?

No, it's a scam!

Yes, yes, a scam. My goodness, I'm rich!

And to think I didn't even know

I had a ticket.

I just need to wire some collateral

to collect the winnings.

Professor, stop!

You're giving away personal information!

I can afford to give away anything I want.

I've won the Spanish National Lottery.

- No, don't!

- It's a scam!

Why won't anybody listen to me?

And my mother's maiden name

and her bank account numbers and...

There!

I'm rich. Rich. Rich!

That must be my $400 now.

Hello. Or should I say, '"Buenos dias '"?

Hi. We own your company now.

I'll deal with these guys.

Welcome, boss.

Guess I was wrong.

There was a robot stupid enough

to download the obedience virus.

I sure was. Make a hole, chumps.

Presenting our new masters!

Where shall I put these auto-dialers,

kind master?

Between the password crank

and the spamjaculator.

Come on!

We've got a whole planet to scam.

And bring me some more Gummi Fungus!

We don't have to stand here

and take abuse from a gross nerd.

- Yeah!

- Yeah!

Now get back to work, you turkeys.

Planet Express is still in business.

We've got crap loads of

quote-unquote merchandise to deliver.

Ship them out, Your Highness.

Finally, some respect.

I feel a little better.

Those marvelous scammers

sure scammed us, huh?

How can you just sit there

kissing the aliens' butt flaps?

Don't you realize

you are totally under their control?

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote