Firehouse Dog
[drumroll]
[rousing orchestral
fanfare playing]
[fanfare ends]
[theme ends with a flourish]
SHANE:
Stars.From a distance,
they seem so mysterious,
so powerful, so perfect.
really just big, bloated balls
of hot, smelly gas.
Unless, by some
freaky twist of fate,
you got close to one, like I did.
Because the star
an actor,
So rich, so pampered,
so out of touch,
he forgot what real life was like.
- MAN:
Waiting on talent!- WOMAN:
Waiting on talent!- Or maybe, he never really knew.
Hey, Liz, what's up?
Time is up, Trey.
Is he coming out or not?
It's not looking good.
I mean, he's really depressed.
Why?
[sighs]
Come in.
But park the negativity
outside,
and I'll show you why.
Hmm?
A fleece?
A black-and-white spotted fleece?
I mean, one of your P.A.s
was wearing this.
So what?
It reminds him
of the girl that broke
his heart is so what.
And now he's in there, and he
Trey, the director's furious.
The weather's getting dicey,
and the plane's been sitting
on the runway idling for hours.
It's his last skydiving shot, Trey.
There must be something
that I can do.
Rexxx...
Rexxx?
All he sees is Lola.
[Rexxx whimpering]
[beads tinkling]
[tango playing]
[whimpering]
[grunting]
[grunting continues]
[whimpering]
[groaning]
LIZ:
This is crazy, Trey.He has to work.
Then you tell him.
Rexxx...
we are talking about your legacy.
- [whimpers]
- That's right.
Your legacy.
Compared to you,
that Taco Bell dog
is just a footnote in history.
[whiny groan]
[growling]
[barking]
I had no idea that bugged him.
Let's get his tuxedo
and his props on.
Yes.
Let's shoot this thing, buddy.
Secret Agent
Dewey Branson
is ready for action.
- [barking]
- Liz...
you're a miracle worker.
Thank you.
- MAN [over radio]: "A" camera's set.
- WOMAN:
"B" camera's good to go.MAN 2:
"C" and "D" cameras are ready.
SHANE:
But sometimes miracles...- MAN 3:
Copy that.- ...can turn into nightmares.
[indistinct radio chatter]
...seven, take one, we have feed.
[thunder rumbles]
Oh, my God!
What happened?!
It's not my fault!
The lightning popped the chute
[howling]
[howling continues]
[squishing]
[groaning]
[adhesive parting]
[whimpering]
[howling]
[howling]
Liz... Liz...
i-i-it's his.
We're close. We're close.
MAN:
You guys look over there by that hill.
We have to keep looking.
LIZ:
Trey...Trey, his hairpiece
could have landed
miles away from...
from the rest of him.
There are lakes and rivers
all over this place.
I...
I'm sorry.
I was supposed to take care of him.
I suck.
I suck.
- [sobbing]:
I suck.- No.
[sobbing]:
I suck. I suck!You don't suck.
[engine idling]
[whines softly]
SHANE:
Maybe the lesson is:
sometimes, to get
to real paradise,
you need to take a road
so dark, there are no stars.
MAN:
Help![coughing]
Help me!
I can't get out!
Is anyone there?
Help me! Shane...!
[gasps]
Shane, you're drooling.
Dude, you are freaking out.
What's up with you?
I didn't get any sleep
at all last night.
for 11 straight hours.
Oh, you're so lucky your old man
pulls 24-hour shifts, dude.
What level did you get up to?
Uh, 13. I was blazing.
J.J.:
You're such a liar.There's no level higher than nine.
Not for you, J.J.
Obviously, you didn't
see the black hole.
Uh-huh.
So, Shane, if you were
gaming all night,
I guess you're not worried
about the science test.
[school bell ringing]
See you there.
Arlo took it first period.
He said it was brutal.
Aw, man, I'm doomed.
And I'm way doomed.
Hey, guys,
I'm just gonna hit
the head real quick.
[rock music playing]
TEACHER:
Keep your books closed.You may not refer to your notes.
Do not look at anyone else's test.
Please be sure to put your name
in the top left-hand corner.
And read through in its entirety.
Go.
[man singing rock]
[siren whooping]
[man singing rock fades]
How's it going, Shane?
Don't you guys have
a fire to put out?
Picking up filters for the rig.
So, what, you ditching school today?
Uh, hello? Holiday.
Malcolm X's birthday.
Malcolm X's birthday.
Is that today?
Yeah, Malcolm X Day.
Right... on.
SHANE:
Hey, I'm gonna roll.I'll see you guys later.
Hey, you want to hitch with us?
No, I'm cool.
Hey, don't be
getting yourself
into any trouble today!
Thanks, Lionel,
I already have a dad!
You'd better call the cap.
[phone rings]
Joe! Get the phone!
You get it!
You get it!
I'm making lunch!
WOMAN:
You're closer, okay?!MAN:
Cap!Pep won't answer the phone!
Since you guys are so busy...
Engine 55. Connor...
LIONEL:
Heads up, Cap.We just saw Shane on Fulton Avenue.
When?
Like, now, maybe 30 seconds ago.
TERENCE:
Hey, ask him if today's Malcolm X's birthday.
Bring him in.
LIONEL:
Okay, Cap, we're on it.And, uh, and maybe pick up lunch.
[objects landing in pot]
[engine starts]
I hate to bring him in today.
[siren whooping]
[distant alarm sounding]
[dogs barking]
Shut your yap.
[groans]
[growls]
Oh, yeah.
You're mine.
[frustrated whimper]
All try...
all fail.
[barking]
[chuckling]
Oh, yeah.
That's right.
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"Firehouse Dog" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 19 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/firehouse_dog_8234>.
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