Eating Out: All You Can Eat Page #2

Synopsis: Tiffani and her friend Casey try to lure the gorgeous Zack with a phony online profile using the image of Tiffani's buff ex, Ryan... which works fine until the real Ryan shows up. Only through some fancy footwork, advice from his Aunt Helen and mentor Harry, and a daring sexual escapade can Casey figure out how to set things right and perhaps even find the love he's been seeking.
Genre: Comedy, Drama, Romance
Director(s): Glenn Gaylord
Production: Ariztical Entertainment
 
IMDB:
6.0
Metacritic:
24
Rotten Tomatoes:
17%
NOT RATED
Year:
2009
80 min
192 Views


- You're hardly a man,

no one would pay for you,

you'll help out

behind the scenes.

- Why would I do that?

- I gave you that job

and I can replace you

with an immigrant, like that!

- Okay, okay,

it's just that I'm not

into the whole gay scene.

- Welcome

to the whole gay scene.

Are you kids here

to volunteer?

- I'm not but Casey is.

- Fabulous.

Darling, you're shaking

like a little Chihuahua.

Don't be nervous,

I don't bite...much.

- He's never volunteered

before.

- Oh, a virgin.

- If you don't count

anal.

- Well, either way,

fill out this paperwork

and then I'll have Zack,

our volunteer coordinator,

meet with you and figure out

which position

you'd be most comfortable in.

So to speak.

- That's why

I don't like these places.

They're full of these

old horn dogs

looking to get laid.

- Jesus.

Lay off the fox news.

- Really, I always hear

'the gay community' this,

the 'gay community' that.

But all I see are a bunch

of drunk a**holes

looking for sex,

who don't care anything

about relationships.

- Excuse me,

Maria full of grace,

but that doesn't sound

any different

than any straight bar.

Drunk sweaty men.

Drooling, groping,

pressing their manhood

all up against

your supple ass

on the dance floor.

- God, you are gayer

than I am.

- Honey, I'm gayer

than a Kevin Spacey

Anderson Cooper chicken wrap,

and what's wrong with that?

- Nothing, it's just

I'm disappointed

at how sex-centric

the gay community is.

- It's called homosexual,

not homo-hug-ual,

what did you expect?

- Romance?

I want to travel the world

on scooters, adopt children.

- Children

are just abortions that eat.

- You know what?

Forget it, I am not signing

that stupid...

Oh, my f***.

- I see you got

your paperwork.

- Uh, yeah...

just let me sign it.

- Cool.

Jonathan?

- Uh, Casey.

- Oh, I'm Zack.

This is Tandy.

- I'm his best friend.

- That's so funny,

I'm here with my best friend,

Tiffani.

- No, I'm more like

your boss.

- Wow, best friends

with T names.

- Yeah, we should like

form a club.

- Excuse me,

I gotta go take a sh*t.

- I'll come with.

- So you're comfortable

taking off your clothes?

- What?

- Oh, I just assumed

you were volunteering

to be one of the studs

in the male sale.

- I'm clearly not a...

stud.

Are you a...a stud?

I mean in the male sale?

- Yes, I'm in the auction.

But I sorta do

everything around here.

- So, wow, how'd you get

into volunteering?

- I'm running credit

for this faggotry studies class

and it's a good way

to meet people.

- Totally good way.

- Well, they look

like they're getting along.

- I guess we have to pretend

to like each other now.

- Wow, you're really good

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Phillip J. Bartell

Phillip John Bartell (born February 18, 1970) is an American film editor, screenwriter, producer and director. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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