Duck Soup Page #4
- NOT RATED
- Year:
- 1933
- 68 min
- 1,531 Views
Groucho
Now we're on the right track.... Put back "dear".....
How does it read?
Bob
(Reading)
"My dear"...
Groucho
You can't say that to the President.... Put back "President"
... Now let's hear how sounds.
Bob
(Reading)
"My dear President"...
Groucho
That's what I wanted in the first place. Tear it up and
send it airmail.
Bob
Is that all?
Groucho
Take another letter.... to my tailor.
Groucho
Dear Sir... enclosed find check for $100. Yours very truly....
Send that immediately.
Bob
I'll have to enclose the check first.
Groucho
You do and I'll fire you.
Groucho glares over his shoulder at Bob to emphasize
his remark as the latter exits from the scene. Mrs. Teasdale
enters to Groucho.
Mrs. Teasdale
(To Groucho)
Your Excellency, the eyes of the world are upon you. Nota-
bles from every land are gathered here in your honor --
(Indicating the guests with a wave of her hand)
This is a gala day for us.
Groucho
Well, a gal a day is enough for me. I couldn't handle any
more.
Mrs. Teasdale
If it's not asking too much --
(Recitative)
For our information
Just for illustration
(Begins tune)
Tell us how you intend to run the nation.
Groucho
(Singing)
These are the laws of my administration:
No one's allowed to smoke
Or tell a dirty joke --
And whistling is forbidden...
Ensemble
(Singing)
We're not allowed to tell a dirty joke
HAIL, HAIL, FREEDONIA
Groucho
(Singing)
If chewing gum is chewed,
The chewer is pursued
And in the hoosegow hidden...
Ensemble
(Singing)
If we should choose to chew, we'll be pursued -
Groucho
If any form of pleasure is exhibited
Report to me and it will be prohibited.
I'll put my foot down;
So shall it be -
This is the land of the free.
The last man nearly ruined this place
He didn't know what to do with it.
If you think this country's bad off now
Just wait 'till I get through with it.
(Does sailor's hornpipe)
The treasury is low on dough;
The last man went and flew with it.
If you think we're short of money now
Just wait 'till I get through with it.
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"Duck Soup" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 19 Apr. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/duck_soup_971>.
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