Doctor Who: The Infinite Quest Page #2

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And then I'll have my revenge!

CAW:
Revenge! Revenge!

Ah, Martha, see those?

-Artificial suns.

-Never!

Someone wanted the planet Bouken warmed up.

What are they?

-Oil rigs.

-Oil rigs?

They still need oil in the future?

It ran out on Earth.

The corporations went drilling elsewhere.

MARTHA:
To look at them,

you'd think they were alive.

DOCTOR:
You think? Run?

-What now?

-I'm open to suggestions.

Why'd you do that?

Oh, Martha, you're brilliant!

Yeah, now you're just showing off.

BOTH:
Whoa!

(ALARM SOUNDING)

-Hoist the colors, Mr. Mate!

-Aye, aye, Captain!

Let OilCorp see that the Black Gold is in business!

Aye, aye, Captain!

BOTH:
Pirates?

I'm Swabb, first mate aboard the Black...

-Now then, Mr. Mate, put her in reverse.

-Aye, aye, Captain!

You two might want to hold on tight.

-To the rail.

-Aye, aye, Captain.

KALIKO:
Take the strain, me hearties!

SWABB:
Heave, lads!

-All right, Swabb. Maximum power!

-Aye!

Well, that I didn't expect.

-Cut thrust, Mr. Mate.

-Then pull the rig in?

And siphon it, Swabb.

-Hello there, Captain...

-Captain Kaliko.

Hello. I'm the Doctor. Martha and I...

MARTHA:
Why are they smashing up the rigs?

The last oil corporations

are sucking the solar system dry to feed demand.

Petrol prices have gone through the roof,

and the colonies that can't afford to pay

are dying.

Aye, and the oil companies call us pirates.

You're smashing the rigs,

siphoning off the petrol.

Robbing the rich to fuel the poor? That's brilliant!

What do you think we should do with them?

-I don't know, Captain.

-Can't hear you!

-A skeleton crew.

-Literally.

Less of a drain on rations.

Now, what I reckon is,

to land up in a place like this

you dogs are either OilCorp spies

or planning a spot of pirating yourselves.

Or, indeed, none of the above.

Either way, I don't want you on the Black Gold.

So ahoy there, me heartless hearties.

Throw these sand lovers overboard!

Hold hard there, lads!

Swabb, you swab, is this mutiny?

-Yes!

-Never, Captain Kaliko, not mutiny.

-No.

-I just wondered if they be OilCorp spies,

mayhaps we dispose of the bodies

by putting them inside one of the oil rigs? Ha ha!

Make it look like an accident.

You're not as empty-headed as you seems,

Mr. Mate.

We'll use the one we just keelhauled.

Aye, aye, Captain.

Don't worry, Doctor, Martha,

you're perfectly safe with me.

What's he up to?

I don't think our Mr. Swabb

is all he's cracked up to be.

I wonder.

Said your prayers yet, Doctor?

Sorry, let me see if I've got this right.

We somehow get inside this rig

that you've drained of oil,

and then what?

A quick blast from me mate Swabb's

laser pistol, the remaining oil ignites.

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