Dirty Girl Page #2

That military academy

is starting to look like

a real sweet option to me

and your mother about now.

In her spare time, Maggie enjoys

long walks by the creek,

and stopping for sodas

at Sonic and shopping.

[Hatcher] Great work,

guys, really terrific.

OK, Clarke and Danielle, you're up.

Who do you think you are?

I mean, really.

You didn't even give her an outfit.

And for everyone else,

I appreciate your effort,

and your time that you put

into realizing your children.

Because, that one

would be dead on the street

or laying under a car somewhere,

with a needle in her arm.

[Up-tempo song plays]

Hey, Mike!

Mike, get in the car.

Let's go!

Get in.

- Me?

- We got homework.

[Danielle] Don't worry

about being nice to my mom.

She's a total poon.

Danielle? Is that you?

This is Clarke. He's from school.

Sue-Ann. I'm Danielle's mom,

but you wouldn't know it to look at me.

That's a totally gross thing to say.

But people think we're

sisters all the time. Cookie?

Nobody wants one of your

sad instant cookies, Sue-Ann.

- You said you liked these.

- I said I liked the dough.

Thanks.

She's nice.

She was a total slut

when she was in high school.

Now she's with this Mormon guy,

and she thinks she's Suzy Homemaker.

Danielle, we talked about this.

You can have boys over,

but this door stays open.

We're doing homework.

Besides, Clarke here's a fag.

Ray's bringing the kids

over for dinner later.

Y'all think you're

gonna be done by then?

If you close the goddamn door and

leave us alone and let us concentrate.

If I talked to my mom that way,

my dad would kick the sh*t out of me.

I don't have a dad.

- So I do what I want.

- [Slow-tempo song plays]

[Danielle] Boy or girl?

I think I'd ruin a boy.

Girl. Name?

Uh... I don't know.

How about Joan? Like Joan Jett.

Or Crawford. That's nice.

Is there some sort of special gene

that makes you say "Crawford"

when I say "Joan"?

Huh?

It just seems the more times

a person gets poked in the butt,

the more likely they

are to say stupid faggy sh*t.

I'm a virgin.

It's not a big deal.

Tell it to my dad.

He'd be happier if I didn't exist.

That's not true.

I'm sure my dad loves me,

and I don't even know him.

That don't make no sense.

You know, if you're not careful,

you're gonna end up one of them

overweight homos with nobody

to love you but a gerbil named Bruce.

- You ready for me, baby?

- [Up-tempo song plays]

Here I come.

Daddy's cleaning you all up.

Yes!

- [Danielle] Is that your dad?

- [Clarke] Unfortunately.

- Where the hell have you been?

- I had homework.

[Danielle] Hey!

You forgot this.

You ruin me for anybody else.

Hey.

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