Diary Of A Wimpy Kid Page #2

by the end of the year,

if things go the way I think they will.

Well, who's at the bottom?

Hey, guys, wanna see my secret freckle?

(BOTH GROAN)

GREG:
Fregley. Sent home for hygiene

issues at least once a month.

Check it out. It's got a hair in it!

What color is that?

You wanna help me name it?

All right, ladies! Gather around!

Come on, put the knitting down! Let's go!

All right, everybody.

I'm Coach Malone

and I am your gym teacher.

P.E. Is as much a part of my life

as waking up in the morning

and going to the bathroom.

I live and breathe Physical Education.

Now, who's with me?

Are you ready to have some fun out there?

Yeah!

MALONE:
All right, outstanding!

So we're gonna divide you up

into two teams.

So you two, over here.

You, you, you, this way.

Yeah, you three, this side. Good.

You guys are going to be Shirts!

And you will be Skins.

Why are we Skins? I hate this.

He's just trying to make

kids like us feel bad.

What do you mean, kids like us?

I just don't want to get a sunburn,

right, Rowley?

(IN ROBOTIC VOICE)

My name is Bell E. Button.

What's yours?

Okay, let's start off with a little game

I like to call Gladiator.

(BOYS EXCLAIMING)

- BO Y 1:
I got this one!

- BO Y 2:
No!

BO Y 3:
Take that!

(GRUNTS)

(NEVER MISS A BEA TPLAYING)

Cover me!

Oh, God.

Not good!

We're never going to be able

to outrun these guys!

We don't have to outrun them!

We just have to outrun Chirag!

Take a look, take a look, take a look

At the kids on the street

No, they never miss a beat

Never miss a beat

Never miss a beat

Never miss a beat

Never miss a beat

- Think they saw us?

- No way.

They were focused on

getting that kid with the limp.

We'll hide here for the rest of the class

because I'm not playing that game.

It's not fair.

He's got all the Neanderthals

on the same team. It's barbaric!

ANGIE:
It's completely barbaric.

This place is an intellectual wasteland.

But, you know, it's nice to meet someone

more interested in his mind

than in his body.

You girls get to jump rope.

What are you doing hiding?

Avoiding the pain.

It all starts in middle school, you know?

You're not a kid anymore.

The coddling has stopped.

Kids are now separated by intelligence.

The weak are picked on.

And girls you've known since kindergarten

won't even talk to you anymore.

Okay, well,

sounds like you got it all figured out,

so go back to your book.

This place is a glorified holding pen.

MALONE:
All the way! All the way!

You're like a machine!

ANGIE:
It's where adults put you

as you make that awkward transition

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