Daddy's Home Page #2

Synopsis: Stepfather Brad Whitaker is hoping for his stepchildren to love him and treat him like a dad. All is going well until the biological father, Dusty Mayron, shows up, then everything takes a toll. His stepchildren start putting him second and their father first, and now Dusty will have to learn that being a good dad is about pains and struggles. Brad will also experience once again what it's like to be a stepdad.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Sean Anders
Production: Paramount Pictures
  1 win & 4 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.1
Metacritic:
42
Rotten Tomatoes:
31%
PG-13
Year:
2015
96 min
Website
6,733 Views


Oh, Brad is Mommy's new husband.

Wait. He doesn't know about me?

Well, I haven't talked to him

in six months.

We've been married eight months.

Brad, Daddy wants to talk to you.

- No! No, no. Don't, don't...

- I'm just going to say hi.

You don't need to do that. Brad, don't.

(CLEARS THROAT) Thank you, sweetie.

Hello, Dusty?

Super to make your acquaintance.

In fact, I just wish

I could shake your hand

and offer to buy you a cold one.

- Tomorrow?

- What?

BOTH:
Daddy's coming! Yay!

Oh, yeah, I guess I could pick you up.

- (WHISPERS) No.

- Hmm?

It's Whitaker.

W-H-I-T-A-K-E-R. (CHUCKLES)

No, I'm not comfortable giving you

my Social Security number over the phone.

Uh, okay, yeah, my credit score is 752.

I'm very proud of that. (CHUCKLES)

I'm sorry? What sort of fighting styles

am I proficient in?

I don't know if I've ever been

asked that before.

Hello, Dusty, hello, hello? Hmm...

I lost him.

What just happened?

Did you just invite him to come here?

Is he coming tomorrow?

Well, I didn't know

he'd accept my offer so soon.

I mean, he really jumped at it.

Remember when I said he was like Jesse

James and Mick Jagger had a baby?

Yeah, I just thought maybe

he was really skinny and

jittery, and had like a little bit

of a British accent, or something.

He's wild and he's crazy.

That's why I fell in love with him.

Then you end up with two kids.

And I'm stuck there holding the bag and

he's nowhere to be found.

It doesn't matter how much love or passion,

or you can't breathe without each other.

All of that stuff is stupid in comparison.

When you have kids,

you have responsibilities.

He doesn't understand that.

Honey, this is actually a good thing.

- (SIGHS)

- I'll welcome Dusty into our home,

and we'll establish some kind

but firm boundaries.

All right? It's what Step-By-Stepdad

calls "setting up a Loving Fence."

A Loving Fence?

Wow, that sounds really great, honey.

But your self-help books

have never met Dusty Mayron.

He sounds like a rascal, but I don't

think it's anything I can't handle.

(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

PANDA SINGER:
Check. Check, check.

Chinese Checkers,

Czech, Czech Republic, pop,

sibilance, sibilance, pop,

one, two, six, seven,

check, check, check, check.

What do you got for me, Brad?

Oh, Mr. Holt, hello. Well, hopefully

the new voice of The Panda.

Oh, listen.

I gotta leave early today. I gotta go

pick up my wife's ex at the airport.

Jesus, kid, how'd you

draw that sh*t detail?

Brad, why do you want

this deadbeat in your home?

Well, it's not that I want him in my home,

it's just that the better

stepparenting books

say that the worst thing you can do

for the kids is to push out the biological.

Rate this script:4.0 / 2 votes

Brian Burns

Brian Burns is an American screenwriter and producer. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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