Crazy Kind of Love Page #3

Augusta.

Henry was saying that

you're having a bad time.

I didn't realize it was so bad.

I wasn't expecting

to see anybody.

Oh, my God. No. Don't apologize.

I'm the one who suddenly appears in

your kitchen at three in the morning.

My mom did the complete opposite

when my dad cut off on her.

She started wearing slutty

clothes, got her hair dyed...

her bellybutton pierced.

I think you're doing

the better thing.

You know? Freak out, right off

the top. Get it out of the way.

When my mom did hit bottom...

You are looking like a

supermodel compared to her.

Damn!

Just stay in bed

until the pain checks out.

It won't be long, though.

I can tell you're

on the upswing.

He forgot to take

his rabbit's foot.

Yeah, I know it's silly.

It's just a goddamn keychain.

But I think

he would've wanted it.

What's up with you

and this Bette chick?

How did you hear about that?

Small town. People talk.

Yeah, no sh*t.

Is she hot?

Yeah.

She's nice.

- Nice?

- She's nice.

Oh, my God. This is serious.

You're really into

this Bette girl.

Hey.

- What can I get you?

- I'll have a draft.

- There you go.

- Thanks.

Holy sh*t!

You sure have grown up,

haven't you?

Yeah. I guess.

I remember when you were the

pervy freshman in gym class...

trying to look up my shorts.

Yeah. I'm sorry about that.

I actually didn't mind.

I'm Janeen, in case you forgot.

I'll see you around, Henry.

Oh, my God. Dude, go get her.

- Nope.

- Oh, really?

Oh, my God. This is serious.

You really like this Bette girl.

Come on.

- Slow down.

- No, it's great!

Easy, old timer.

You slept out here?

Yeah.

I was waiting for Bette,

but she never came.

I think you should tell me if she's

going to be spending a lot of time here...

and if she is, I think we should

work out some kind of schedule.

Why do we need a schedule?

She's very disruptive.

What the f***

is there to disrupt?

This place was like a tomb

until you came home.

My God! My mother

is driving me crazy!

Why does she have luggage?

I cannot deal with her.

What happened?

Can I just stay here awhile?

Yeah. Of course you can.

Got you in the butt!

Got you in the butt!

Rise and shine!

Or maybe just sit up and

twinkle. No need to overexert.

Ta-da!

I don't watch TV.

It is never too late to start.

I would recommend you start

with a few talk shows...

then work your way up to a good,

healthy soap addiction.

Steamed kale? Really?

This is not depression food.

Matthew really needs

to get with the program.

We are in DEFCON 3, people!

You need Springer,

snack food, trash mags.

I'm gonna get some Cheetos.

You know why?

Today's goal is to be bloated

and brain-dead by noon.

I want you five pounds overweight

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