Connie and Carla Page #2

Synopsis: After accidentally witnessing a mafia hit in the Windy City, gal pals Connie and Carla skip town for L.A., where they go way undercover as singers working the city's dinner theater circuit ... as drag queens. Now, it's not enough that they become big hits on the scene; things get extra-weird when Connie meets Jeff -- a guy she'd like to be a woman with.
Genre: Comedy, Crime, Music
Director(s): Michael Lembeck
Production: Universal Pictures
  1 win.
 
IMDB:
6.3
Metacritic:
44
Rotten Tomatoes:
43%
PG-13
Year:
2004
98 min
$7,976,065
Website
458 Views


Where can we go?

- New York?

- New York?

- New York's too obvious.

- Florida?

- Florida?

- They can't hide.

- We can't hide!

- We gotta go someplace where we can just blend in.

Okay. Somewhere where

they'd never look for us,

because there's no theater,

no musical theater,

no dinner theater,

no culture at all.

Los Angeles.

We could be L.A. girls now.

We should work out.

Good one.

Thank you.

Oh. Oh, I think

I have a tissue.

- Here.

- Thank you.

What's this?

I don't know.

I can't see!

Oh, it tastes really funny!

Don't inhale!

Spit it out!

Stop breathing!

Where'd you get that?

I didn't get it!

Carla!

It was in your bag!

We've been rehearsing a lot,

and he's got that newjob.

What if he doesn't even have any job? What if

he's found somebody else? Yeah, yeah, that's it.

I think Mikey cheated on me, 'cause I was

always working nights. It's not his fault.

It was probably that waitress

at Dodo's Diner. The blond?

She always looks at him funny when she

brings him his cheese melt. Hi, Mikey.

She makes me sick,

she's so sweet.

So sweet. Like the devil

in devil's food cake.

She just- She makes me wanna puke.

She makes me wanna vomit.

It's okay, Carla.

It's okay.

We deserve better,

that's for sure.

You know what?

No more time for losers, Carla.

Mm-mmm.

When one door closes,

another door opens.

Yeah, life is like a patio door. You

never know which side is gonna be open.

Mm-hmm, and you walk

into the glass.

Get your motor runnin'

Head out on the highway

Lookin'for adventure

In whatever comes our way

Yeah, darling

gonna make it happen

Take the world

in a lovely embrace

Fire all of your guns at once and

Explode into space

Born to be wild

They look friendly here.

Oh, I really like it here.

Me too. I got a good

feeling about this, Carla.

- Yeah? Me too.

- Yeah. Okay.

It really feels safe here.

Oh, gunshot!

Oh, Connie, they found us!

We're gonna die! Let

me look! Let me look!

Oh, we're okay.

We're okay.

Oh, cute!

Don't bother, Carla. They're all

just Als and Mikeys with a tan.

No more boyfriends for us.

Oh, wait, back up!

Back up!

Where are you?

Are you okay?

They're not okay. Are

you eating? Okay, Mom-

We're eating, Ma. Well,

what are you doing for money?

I'm sure they've got jobs.

As prostitutes.

I'd be hard pressed to say I can't remember a

better-looking group of tourists. And I mean that.

I hope you're ready, 'cause today is the

day when all the stars are coming out.

So, keep your cameras ready,

'cause here we go.

Oh, look at that.

Another celebrity

getting arrested.

Kidding. I'm kidding.

Okay. Now-

Excuse me, sir? Could we please

drive by Debbie Reynolds's house?

Rate this script:4.0 / 1 vote

Nia Vardalos

Antonia Eugenia "Nia" Vardalos is a Canadian-American actress, screenwriter, director, and producer of Greek descent. more…

All Nia Vardalos scripts | Nia Vardalos Scripts

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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