Comrade X Page #2

AND I'M BUSY.

SO AM I.

GO RIGHT AHEAD,

ONLY DON'T HOLLER SO

LOUD WHEN YOU DICTATE.

I GOT A HEAD ON ME

LIKE AN INCINERATOR.

TURN ON THE BATH,

IF IT'S WORKING.

MR. THOMPSON,

THIS IS MY ROOM,

AND I MUST ASK YOU TO

VACATE, IF YOU PLEASE!

THAT'S A FINE WAY

TO TALK.

I GET THIS ROOM,

I FIX IT UP,

I PAY FOR IT IN ADVANCE,

AND I LIVE IN IT.

YOU MARCH IN:

AND TRY TO THROW ME OUT.

IS THAT A NICE WAY FOR

A NAZI TO ACT? I ASK YOU.

AND I ASK YOU FOR THE

LAST TIME TO LEAVE MY ROOM!

OUR ROOM, OLD BOY.

YOU CAN TAKE THE COUCH.

I'LL TAKE THE BED.

EXCUSE ME,

MR. THOMPSON.

HOW SOON CAN I TALK

TO YOU ALONE?

YOU'LL HAVE TO WAI TILL I'M ALONE, VANYA.

THANK YOU.

WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

OLGA.

OK, OLGA. YOU CAN CURL

UP IN THE FIREPLACE.

THAT'S RUSSIA-EVERYBODY

SHARES EVERYTHING.

IT IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO SHARE A ROOM

WITH AN IRRESPONSIBLE AMERICAN LOUT,

A MAN WHO:

IS A DISGRACE:

TO THE PROFESSION

OF JOURNALISM-

SHH! HOLD IT.

YOU HEAR THAT?

HEAR WHAT?

THE RATS. THEY'VE BEEN

NIBBLING AWAY AT THIS HOTEL

EVER SINCE:

COMRADE LENIN DIED.

THERE HE IS.

LOOK AT HIM...

LICKING HIS WHISKERS.

WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

I MISSED HIM.

THAT SETTLES IT!

I AM GOING FIRS TO THE MANAGEMENT,

NEXT TO THE GERMAN EMBASSY,

THEN TO THE KREMLIN.

YOU WILL FIND:

THAT IT'S NOT SO EASY

TO TAKE AWAY THE RIGHTS

FROM A GERMAN!

WELL, IT'S GREA TO BE HOME.

GOOD-BYE.

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

WITH MR. HOFER.

I'M HIS SECRETARY.

WHAT'S HE PAY YOU?

200 RUBLES A WEEK.

I'LL GIVE YOU

A HUNDRED-CASH.

OH, THANK YOU.

I'LL TAKE IT.

OK, SNOOKS.

YOUR FIRST DUTY IS TO

RELAX AND TAKE IT EASY

WHILE I JUMP:

IN THE TUB.

HELLO. WHAT'S THIS?

OPEN HOUSE?

WHERE'S MR. THOMPSON?

HE'S WASHING HIMSELF

IN A BATHTUB.

SIT DOWN, PLEASE,

AND WAIT.

HEY, MAC,

HURRY IT UP.

HELLO, JANEY.

I'LL BE RIGHT OUT.

JUST HEARD:

YOU WERE BACK.

OUR COLLEAGUE HERR VON HOFER

IS RAISING THE ROOF DOWNSTAIRS.

CLAIMS YOU:

KICKED HIM OUT.

THAT'S A LIE.

I STARTED SHOOTING

AT SOME RATS,

AND VON HOFER:

TOOK IT PERSONALLY.

HELLO, HONEYBUN.

YOU MISS ME?

OH, I CAN ALWAYS GO TO

THE ZOO WHEN YOU'RE AWAY.

OH, I GOT RIVALS,

HUH?

WHAT'S THE IDEA OF COMING

IN WITHOUT KNOCKING?

EXCUSE ME.

OH, HERE WE ARE!

THE GREATEST PICK-ME-UP

KNOWN TO MAN.

YOU REALLY MISSED SOMETHING A THE KREMLIN THIS MORNING, MAC.

YEAH? HOW IS

THE OLD KREMLIN?

SAME OLD RATTRAP. FULL OF STUFFED

SHIRTS DOUBLE-CROSSING THE MASSES.

SOMEDAY THE PEOPLE

ARE GOING TO GET WISE

AND TAKE IT APAR BRICK BY BRICK.

EXCUSE ME. YOU WISH TO PAY FOR THIS?

YEAH. HOW MUCH?

230 RUBLES.

WHAT ARE YOU:

TALKING ABOUT?

TWO BOTTLES:

AT 15 RUBLES APIECE.

WHAT'S THE 200 FOR?

THAT'S FOR ME SO I AM NO TELLING THE SECRET POLICE

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