Cellmates Page #2

So I say, "Sure thing, amigo, hop right in!

Ain't nothin' I like better than takin' a Mexican back to Mexico!"

So I ask him,

I say, "How come you're goin' back to Mexico?

Don't you like it out here in America?"

- What'd he say?

- He said, "oh, si, seor, I like it very much."

- "That's why I'm going back to mexico To get my wife

and six children And bring 'em back to your country."

- I'd be damned.

And that's about the time I open my car door

And kick that son of a b*tch right out of the car!

( Both laugh )

- You must've been doin' 50!

- Sixty-Five.

- I don't want no one thinkin' the klan ain't got no

sense of humor now!

- That's a hell of a story, Leroy,

A hell of a story.

I got a lot of 'em, bubba,

a lot of stories.

I've been in the klan 45 years...

I've been harassed

for the klan, Persecuted,

shot at, beaten.

Persecuted,

shot at, beaten.

I marched, I boycotted.

Hell, I even gave up my freedom for the cause.

Guard:
Lights Out!

You're a great man, Leroy,

A hell of a great man.

Every tuesday, we spent one hour with the warden

For the benefit of our rehabilitation.

Cultivating potatoes teach a man all he kneed to know

About living a moral life.

He who sows righteousness

reaps a sure reward. Proverbs.

Not all potatoes are the same, mind you.

Yellow potatoes, for instance are good for boilin'.

Yukon gold...

White potatoes, au gratin, oh...

Russet potatoes, fingerlings,

hash browns...

Let my teachings fall like rain.

You wanna make the perfect potato stew?

- I feel... Rehabilitated.

- You do now?

- That's right.

If I get an early releasefrom prison,

I'm fixin' to return to my life as a door-To-Door

vacuum salesman.

- A vacuum salesman?

- That's brill vacuum cleaners, mind you,

- Unquestionably the finest value on the market!

- Well,

that sound like a hell of an honest job, Leroy.

But, uh...

what about the klan?

Hmm. Well, the klan's gonna have to get along without me,

- As I'm gonna be gainfully employed and all.

- I heard they're already gettin' along without you just fine..

- What have you heard?

- That they've elected a new grand dragon in your absence.

So there's plenty of time for you to sell vacuums when you get out...

In 19 months.

I want this place shinin'

like a pair of new boots!

You hear me?

Ever heard the story of the woman who walks into a man's life

And don't make one bit of difference?

Neither have I.

I think the time's come for me to give the good ol' warden here

A display of my influencein this neck of the woods.

- I'm gonna stir up a hell of a fuss!

- You are?

- Uh-Huh.

I'm gonna write the white tuna and I'm gonna call

On every klansmen east of the mississippi,

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