Cast a Deadly Spell Page #3

"JEEVES,"

I CAN FIND:

MY OWN WAY OUT.

( glass clinking )

MAY I OFFER YOU A DRINK,

MR. LOVECRAFT?

I LOOKED:

AT THE REGISTRATION

ON THE STEERING COLUMN

OF YOUR CAR.

- BRANDY?

- NO, IT'S

TOO EARLY FOR ME.

- THAT'S QUITE A TIE.

- OH, THANKS.

PUT UP MUCH OF A FIGHT?

NO, I SNUCK UP BEHIND IT.

NOW, WHAT DOES

MY DRIED-UP OLD

WALNUT OF A FATHER

WANT WITH A PRIVATE

DETECTIVE?

IT DOESN'T SAY

DETECTIVE ON MY:

REGISTRATION.

IT DOES:

ON THE BUSINESS CARDS

IN YOUR GLOVE COMPARTMENT.

YOU DIDN'T ROTATE MY TIRES

WHILE YOU WERE AT IT,

DID YOU?

MAYBE LATER.

WHAT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY?

DECEMBER 5,

SAME AS WALT DISNEY

AND MARTIN VAN BUREN.

SAGITTARIUS,

WITH 16 LETTERS

TO YOUR NAME...

NOT BAD.

NOT PERFECT,

BUT NOT BAD.

WHAT SIGN:

WAS LARRY WILLIS

BORN UNDER?

- GEMINI.

- TWINS.

MAYBE I OUGHT TO CHARGE

YOUR OLD MAN DOUBLE FOR

TAKING CARE OF HIM.

IS THAT WHY:

MY FATHER HIRED YOU,

TO DEFEND MY HONOR?

THIS IS GONNA BE

THE EASIEST MONEY

YOU EVER MADE.

YEAH? HOW COME?

NO, I DON'T THINK SO.

YOU WOULDN'T WANT ME

TO MAKE IT TOO EASY

FOR YOU, WOULD YOU?

YOU DON'T LOOK

LIKE THE KIND.

IF YOU WANT SOMETHING,

I BET YOU'D BE WILLING

TO WORK FOR IT.

WORK HARD,

REALLY CRACK A SWEAT,

KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

YOU BETTER TAKE:

THAT BLOUSE OFF.

OH, WHY?

WE CAN'T GE BLOODSTAINS LIKE THA ON IT IF THEY SET.

AFTER THE HUNT, I USUALLY

TAKE ALL MY CLOTHES OFF

AND BURN THEM.

YOU HAVE TO BE NAKED

FOR THE CEREMONY.

OH YEAH?

WHAT CEREMONY IS THAT?

IT SHOULD BE TO DIANA,

GODDESS OF THE HUNT.

- AH.

- WOULD YOU LIKE

TO WATCH?

THANKS, BUT I'M SUPPOSED

TO GET MY TEETH CLEANED

THIS AFTERNOON.

WELL, YOU'RE DIFFERENT,

LOVECRAFT, I GIVE YOU THAT.

YOU'RE SORT OF SOMETHING

DIFFERENT YOURSELF.

- AM I?

- MM-HMM.

ALL THAT SMOKE:

AND NOT A LICK OF FLAME

TO BACK IT UP.

WHAT MAKES YOU SAY THAT?

WELL, ONLY VIRGINS

CAN CATCH UNICORNS,

ISN'T THAT RIGHT?

JUST WHAT I THOUGHT.

( thunder rumbling )

THE RADIO SAID IT WAS

GOING TO BE CLEAR ALL DAY.

( sighs )

( children yelling )

( children chanting )

( engine sputtering )

GOD DARN, HERE WE GO.

SOUNDS LIKE:

THE CHOKE'S STUCK.

AIN'T EITHER

NO GODDARN CHOKE.

BUT I KNOW WHAT IT IS.

LITTLE BASTARDS.

AFTER WORLD WAR I,

THE ONLY THING:

WE BROUGHT BACK:

FROM FRANCE WAS THE CLAP.

THIS WAR, THEY GO OFF

TO THE PACIFIC:

AND BRING BACK:

THESE DAMN GREMLINS.

( all squeaking

and laughing )

( crying )

LITTLE BASTARDS:

GET INTO EVERYTHING.

- ( slams )

- ( gremlin sneezes )

YOU LIVE HERE?

I OWN IT AND RUN IT.

I USED TO RUN I WITH MY WIFE.

SHE DIED EIGHT YEARS AGO,

RUN OVER BY A PIE WAGON.

SOMEBODY LIVE HERE

BY THE NAME OF:

LARRY WILLIS?

THAT'S THE PAR WHERE I ASK WHO WANTS

TO KNOW.

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