Candiland Page #3

- Hold it!

I'm not just his father,

I'm his everything.

- Wow.

- - Yes wow.

- So you smothered the poor

boy, and now you're gonna

fix everything by smothering him

again?

- Queen Tessa...

I wanna live here with you

in Candiland forever.

- What I'm telling you is-

- you just want to be in

control.

- Is that you, Arnie?

- - Yes.

- Well...

You don't always have to be the

leader.

- And so we are one.

- Maybe you should try

following.

- Yes ma'am.

- I love you, Peter.

Good morning, honey lover.

- Did I notice any strange

smells?

You know I live right next

to the garbage chute, right?

And I work at a chemical plant.

And my girlfriend's an escort.

So I'm kinda, like,

used to weird smells.

- Okay, well did you

notice anything unusual

from the guy living in 619?

- Nah, he seemed like a

pretty cool dude actually.

- Peter, can you hear me?

- I'm worried about my knee.

- Well, there are surgical

procedures that we can do, but

nothing is 100%.

We can help you get your

quality of life back though.

- Will any of these things

result in me

playing tennis again?

- No.

No.

I know you don't want to believe

this, but

you're a lucky man.

- But tennis is all I have.

- Cold.

Well you're gonna have to

start looking at the world

a little bit differently, Peter.

You look around,

you'll find something worth

living for.

- And that's it?

- Yes, you hear me Peter?

- There's nothing else you can

do for me?

- There is one thing, doctor.

- Yes, yes there is one thing.

One thing that will solve

all of your problems,

get you back on the court by

Monday.

- Really, what is it?

Please tell me, I'll try

anything.

- It's the fresh scent of

bright beam laundry detergent.

Oh, nothing leaves a softer-

&k bright beam &k

- bright beam laundry detergent.

Nothing gets your clothes...

- Peter?

What's going on?

- Nothing.

The television broke.

It's nothing.

And who needs it.

Who needs time?

Force me into some pointless

routine.

I'm not a slave to schedule

anymore!

- Hey!

Hey, what the f*** man?

Hey, you can't leave your

f***ing shitty TV here, man.

What the f***?

Hey!

I'm calling the manager, f***

face.

Hey man, come on.

- Someone will take the set

away.

It's not that big a deal.

- Let's just have a little

conversation about you

and where you place your

TV man, that's it man.

Just me and you and my fist in

your face.

- Guy's probably got a

list of sins a mile long

but he's Mr. Consumatic!

Screaming like a jackass

at another human being!

- You got some serious f***ing

issues.

You know what?

I'm gonna keep this f***ing

clock.

This is f***ing mine.

- I don't want to go out there.

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