Bringing Down the House Page #2

Synopsis: Peter Sanderson is a divorced, straight-laced, uptight attorney who still loves his ex-wife and can't figure out what he did wrong to make her leave him. However, Peter's trying to move on, and he's smitten with a brainy, bombshell barrister he's been chatting with online. However, when she comes to his house for their first face-to-face, she isn't refined, isn't Ivy League, and isn't even a lawyer. Instead, it's Charlene, a prison escapee who's proclaiming her innocence and wants Peter to help her clear her name. But Peter wants nothing to do with her, prompting the loud and shocking Charlene to turn Peter's perfectly ordered life upside down, jeopardizing his effort to get back with his wife and won a billion dollar client.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Adam Shankman
Production: Touchstone Pictures
  4 wins & 13 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.6
Metacritic:
39
Rotten Tomatoes:
34%
PG-13
Year:
2003
105 min
Website
2,797 Views


I would suggest|you run to the kitchen

and get some tuna tartare|for William Shakespeare

on the house.

Yes, sir.

I'm terribly sorry, ma'am.

Where and when tomorrow?

Hello, Mr. Sanderson.

Oh, Mrs. Kline.|Always a pleasure.

And when am I going to|get to babysit

with your charming|little Georgey again?

Oh, uh, well, uh, soon,

because he just loves|coming over to your place.

Uh, Mr. Sanderson?

Those Latin people|who were skulking around...

Oh. They were looking|at the Aruda house.

Casing it?

No, uh, to buy it.

Oh, please.

If they're in this block and not|carrying a leaf blower...

Well, I'd love to discuss this|with you further,

but I'm expecting someone.

Hey.

Hi.

I hope you like cham...

...poo.

What's up, baby?

Ooh, champagne.|I love champagne.

This for me?

Oh, I'm sorry. I think|you have the wrong house.

It is damn good|to finally connect.

Pardon me?

It's me, fool... Charlene.

Ooh, food.

What?

It's me, honey.|Your date... Lawyer-girl.

You can't be.

Hey, hey, hey.|Leave that alone.

Well, why can't I?

Because you're not a blonde.

Can't get nothing past you.

You must be|a bomb-ass lawyer.

Oh, look at all|of these pretty candles...

all romantic and sh*t.

Somebody was planning|on getting some booty tonight.

Hey! Leave that alone.|There are settings.

And you can't be Charlene,|because Charlene is more of...

Skinny white broad?

Yeah.

You know, I get that a lot.

But that's your fault|you're thinking that, bro.

You must have not have took|a good look at that picture.

I have looked|at that picture a lot,

and trust me,|you are not in it.

Move, move, move.|Let me do it.

See?

There I am.

Sorry you got it|twisted, dog.

I don't get a lot of|photo ops where I been.

Where exactly have you been?

I got a rumble in the jungle.|We still having dinner or what?

I asked you a question.

Rolex.

Rolex?

I did time, baby,|but I ain't do the crime.

You're a convict?

Bump that.

Shoot,|Roscoe cracked that door.

I kicked it off the heezy|and bounced.

For real, though.

What did you just say?

What, don't you hear good?

All right.

Let's see.|How can I put this?

I was recently liberated|from a correctional facility...

All right. I get it.

You're in the big house, and|you get someone to type for you,

and you get on the Internet,|and you misrepresent yourself.

It happens, and I'm a sucker,

but now you have to go,|because this is over.

Unh-unh. No, no, no.

Biscuit,|you misrepresented yourself.

Boyishly light... please.

Gray.

You said you was|a criminal lawyer.

I pulled your file.

You're just some sorry-ass|tax attorney.

A tax lawyer is|a criminal lawyer.

Oh, yeah?

Well, good,|'cause that's why I'm here.

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Jason Filardi

Jason Filardi is an American screenwriter from Mystic, Connecticut. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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