Borderland Page #2

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What a Hallmark moment.

I'll be right back.

Hold on one minute.

Hola.

Una ms cerveza, por favor.

"Fabor. "

Pardon?

"Fabor. "

The V is pronounced

like a B.

"Fabor. Cerbeza. "

Sorry.

My Spanish sucks.

At least you can order a beer

at a strip club.

What else

do you need to know?

She wants 80 for an hour,

and she'll do anal.

Anal?

Who said I want anal?

Well, you got a problem

with anal?

No, I...

You asked her that?

She's a professional, okay?

If I'm paying for her services,

I think I have a right

to know what they include.

She's barely 17, okay?

She's practically

a virgin herself.

Do not pass this up, okay?

I want you

to have a good time.

I want you to grow up.

I want you to be a man.

Hey, wait a minute.

This is for you.

But you already know that.

- I'm talking to you!

- Let me go!

- Now, a**hole.

- F***ing b*tch!

Why don't you chill, man?

She's no pro.

It's okay.

I can handle it.

It's okay.

This dickless f*ggot

more your type, Valeria?

F*** off, Gilberto.

You think you have the balls

for this girl?

I ask you something.

You deaf?

What the f***'s

your problem, man?

Ow! Sh*t!

That was pretty stupid.

At least now you have a great

story to tell your friends.

What? That I got my ass kicked?

No. How you came to the aid of a poor

and defenseless woman.

Yeah, right.

If it ever gets boring

around here,

you could bat cleanup

for the Astros.

You know, my ex-husband,

he hated the fact

that I could handle myself.

Let me guess.

That's why he's your ex.

I left him,

and I moved here

to Manzanita.

Can I buy you

a drink later?

So you're not afraid

of strong woman?

Only if she's not

swinging a bat at me.

It's okay, don't be afraid.

I'm not.

I mean...

Does that have to be there?

You don't like it?

I do. It's just...

I feel like I'm being watched.

You have a kid?

Oh, I'm so going to hell.

What's her name?

Mati.

Don't cry.

She's beautiful, Amelia.

She likes you.

I'm working with amateurs,

I swear to God.

You almost get yourself cold

over some bangette.

- And you!

- What?

Falling for a hooker?

Come on.

Come on, Phil.

You're killing me.

I like her.

She's sweet. So what?

I thought you wanted

to get laid.

- Her kid was right there.

- So?

I paid 80 bucks

so he could change diapers.

You want your money back?

Here.

Just f***ing take it.

I'm going to the bathroom.

Yeah, you do that, putz.

You try to raise them right.

Hey, isn't that

your hot tamale?

That's Valeria.

Try to act halfway civilized

for once.

Hola.

Hola.

Um, this is my cousin, Lupe.

Lupe, this is Eduardo.

Hola.

Hola.

What is up with your cousin?

She's just, uh, traditional.

Tell her that 'shrooms

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