Bo Burnham: Words, Words, Words Page #2
- TV-MA
- Year:
- 2010
- 63 min
- 565 Views
EASILY BROKEN:
OH, YEAH
VAGINAS:
BECAUSE THEY'LL
OH, YEAH
PUZZLES STILL DON'T
OH,
YEAH,
(cheers and applause)
AND TOES:
'CAUSE THEY'RE EASY
TO COUNT ON:
(audience aws)
IT'S CUTE.
(laughter)
AND CROWS:
'CAUSE THEY HATE
USING CONDOMS:
(laughter and applause)
WHAT?
OH, YEAH
I DON'T.
THE HOLOCAUST:
IT'S TRUE.
OH, YEAH
FOR EVERY DOLLAR
THAT A MAN MAKES
THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE,
THAT'S NOT FAIR
MEN AND WOMEN:
FOR HERMAPHRODITE
OH, YEAH
OH, WELL, YEAH
MALE STRIPPERS:
ALWAYS LOOK LIKE
THEY'RE APPLYING LOTION
JUST LOOK LIKE:
CONFUSED FIREMEN
THANKS.
(cheers and applause)
THANK YOU.
(man)
PICK THAT WEDGE!
(mocking laugh)
(laughter)
(audience member
wolf whistles)
I'M 19 YEARS OLD.
I'M A YOUNG COMEDIAN.
"YOUNG COMEDIAN."
I PREFER "PRODIGY."
AND PEOPLE PIGEONHOLE ME,
YOU KNOW, AS A COMIC,
'CAUSE I'M NOT A COMEDIAN.
I'M AN ARTIST.
I DO ONE-MAN SHOWS.
1998 WAS MY FIRST ONE-MAN SHOW.
IN NAZI GERMANY:
CALLED:
"UNDER THE FLOORBOARDS."
(light laughter)
NO, NO, NO, WATCH AND THEN JUDGE.
THIS IS A SCENE:
FROM "UNDER THE FLOORBOARDS."
(clears throat)
HEY.
SHH!
THEN IN '99--
(laughter and applause)
"THE CATHOLIC ORGASM."
(moans, sobs)
2000...UM...
"THE INAPPROPRIATE MUSICIAN."
MIKE...
MIKE.
MIKE,
WITHOUT A FATHER?
I'M YOUR FRIEND! MIKE!
MIKE, NO, MIKE!
NO, MIKE!
(plays descending note)
(plays ascending note)
HE'S SAVED.
AND THEN IN, UM, 2001,
EXCEPT I ADAPTED I INTO A STORY
ABOUT AN INTERGALACTIC SEXUAL
PREDATOR:
(laughter)
2002, I DID A PIECE--
IF YOU'RE FAMILIAR WITH
I DID A PIECE BASED OFF THA CALLED "BULLDOG MAN"
AND I'LL DO A MONOLOGUE
(laughter)
2000, UH...
(cheers and applause)
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"Bo Burnham: Words, Words, Words" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/bo_burnham:_words,_words,_words_4402>.
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