Blockers Page #2

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- I almost died.

- Prom night!

- (whooping)

- Prom!

I'm so, so excited.

Oh, me, too.

(school bell ringing)

Mm. I love you.

I love you, too.

All right.

- We're so gross.

- I know.

People are looking at us.

- I don't care.

- We better get

"cutest couple"

in the yearbook.

Here we go

Here we go.

I'm having sex.

That's great.

I'm having soup.

No.

Tonight with Austin.

- Wait, you're finally gonna do it?

- Yeah.

I mean, you know, we've been

dating for six months,

and we love each other,

and I just awkwardly

got my pediatrician

to put me on birth control.

She gave me a sticker.

Two because I was good, so...

I know it's, like, kind of

corny or whatever, but it just

seems like prom night...

it's kind of perfect, you know?

We're gonna have, like,

dim lighting

and rose petals on the bed

and the scent from that candle

that gets me horny

every time I pass it

in Walgreens.

All candles get me horny.

JULIE:
I'm gonna look

into Austin's eyes,

and then he's gonna look

into mine,

and then we're gonna, like,

touch each other's faces,

you know?

For, like, a long time.

Like, a long time.

Just to, like, connect.

And then we're gonna...

Kapow.

All right, f*** it, I'm in.

- What?

- I'm in.

I'm having sex tonight, too.

Uh... just like that?

Yeah. I mean, why not?

Because it's your first time,

and your first time

should be special and perfect.

Yours can be special

and perfect.

Mine is gonna be tonight

and with that dude.

Yeah, they're just brownies.

They're not, like...

SAM:
Connor Aldrich?

Your lab partner?

- Yeah. What?

- You haven't even hooked up with him.

You haven't even

seen his thing yet.

What if he has a weird one?

They're all weird.

Penises are not for looking at.

They're for use.

They're like plungers.

Listen, my student athlete days

are over.

Tonight is the beginning

of my adult life,

and for the first time

I can do whatever I want.

So I want to go to prom,

get drunk,

get potted up on weed

and lose my goddamn virginity.

We're gonna have the same

first-time-sex anniversary.

We can go to dinner every year

and commemorate it.

- Olive Garden.

- Yes! Olive Garden.

Breadsticks for life, b*tch.

- Yeah!

- Oh, my God, it is gonna be

such a relief to get this over

and done with before college.

Um, no, I mean, like...

No, it's cool.

I just don't think

I'm there yet.

You know, maybe something

might happen tonight

with me and Chad, but, uh,

I don't think sex

is gonna be that thing.

JULIE:

Sam?

(chuckles) But you never know

what could happen.

I mean, maybe

my inner sexual Smaug

will emerge from its keep

and spread its mighty wings.

I never know

what you're talking about.

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