Blackadder's Christmas Carol

Synopsis: Edmund Blackadder and Baldrick his dogsbody are transplanted this time to Dickensian England in this one-off episode. He is kind, gentle and caring, but visits from an assortment of ghosts soon have him back to his old ways.
Genre: Comedy, History, Short
43 min

this muff, which I'm going to give you tomorrow...

Dem! Dem! Dem!

Excellent! What a splendid spread!

Nuts, turkey and presents.

What more could one desire at Christmas?

Well a tree.

Of course, I quite forgot.

I dropped in on Mr Thicktwistle's

Garden Emporium

and, I think you'll agree, got quite a bargain

on this special Christmas twig.

- It's a bit of a tiddler, ain't it?

- Yes, but size isn't important.

It's not what you've got, it's where you stick it.

Besides, we've got a whole year's

profits to spend on fun and larks.

- How much is it?

- 17 and a penny.

It'd be lots more if you didn't

give so much to the poor.

Yes, but in the feeling good

ledger of life, we are rich indeed.

I wish we weren't doing so well

in the short-of-pressies-gullible-prat ledger.

Well bless my ten toes,

who could that be on this cold night?

Ah, Mrs Scratchit, greetings

on this merry Yuletide Eve.

Oh, Mr Blackadder!

How can I be merry when we're so poor

we'll have nothing to eat on Christmas Day,

except what Grandfather can scrape

from under his big toenails?

No goose for Tiny Tom this year!

Mrs Scratchit, Tiny Tom is 15 stone

and built like a brick privy.

If he eats any more heartily,

he will turn into a pie shop.

Dear me! There must be something we can do.

Ah, that box of matches

in your basket is just the thing I need.

- How much?

- A quid a match.

Mrs Scratchit, I suspect that to be a lie of sorts.

Oh, but it's Christmas Eve, so, here, take 10.

So you don't want all the matches, then?

There's 17 of 'em.

You have the body of a weak woman,

but the mind of a criminal genius.

- Here, 17 pounds, then.

- Lovely!

And my best wishes to your massive offspring!

So we had 17 and a penny,

and we give Mrs Scratchit 17, so that leaves...

Yes, come on, Mr Baldrick,

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Richard Curtis

Richard Whalley Anthony Curtis, CBE (born 8 November 1956) is a New Zealand-born English screenwriter, producer and film director. One of Britain's most successful comedy screenwriters, he is known primarily for romantic comedy films such as Four Weddings and a Funeral, Bridget Jones's Diary, Notting Hill, and Love Actually, as well as the hit sitcoms Blackadder, Mr. Bean and The Vicar of Dibley. He is also the co-founder of the British charity Comic Relief along with Lenny Henry. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018


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"Blackadder's Christmas Carol" STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 27 May 2020. <>.

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