Baskin

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1

Mom! Mom!

Mom!

Mom!

Mom! Mom!

Dude, it pays more, bet on that.

Bro, listen. The deal here is...

You gotta keep your odds low, okay?

Then you'll play to win big.

- Got it?

- You're telling me?

Son, I was doing this

when you were still a baby.

Good for you, brother!

- Okay, okay. Write it. Mallorca.

- Mallorca.

- Barcelona vs Atletico Madrid.

- Arda Turan!

- Who cares about Arda? Barcelona it is.

- Barcelona.

- Exactly. I agree.

- They won the championship last season.

Dude, I like Catalans.

Catalans are good.

- Messi will score. Barcelona it is.

- Barcelona, okay.

- Write it down.

- Alright.

- Zaragoza vs Girona.

- Girona?

- I like this name. It's like "enter this bet".

- Okay, that's a likeable team.

- The name says it man: "enter this!".

- What about the odds?

- Okay, let's bet on this.

- Girona 1.9, Zaragoza 1.4.

- Okay, dude.

- Girona!

- Enter this bet! Yes.

- Okay, the last one. The last game.

No way I'd bet for Albacete,

I wouldn't play anyway.

Seyfi! Are you in, man?

You want to bet?

- Dude! Hello?

- Seyfi!

Seyfi, do you still have that headache?

Boss, enough with your f***ing bets.

- My head's all f***ed up because of you.

- Oh, man!

Bro, watch your words

or I'll f*** you like a chicken now.

Yavuz,

I bet you actually f***ed a chicken before.

- What?

- Chicken, man, you know.

Chief, please,

not in front of the newbie.

Alright, alright. Just kidding man.

Don't get offended so easily.

- But I have plenty friends who f***ed chicken.

- You and your friends, man!

Look, it's not about f***ing the chicken.

No, it's about catching it.

Chief, why don't you tell us

about your first time?

- Was it with a goat or a cow?

- It was with an elephant!

My first was an elephant! OK?

Cut the crap now.

- Come on!

- Chief, come on.

- Arda!

- Hey, go easy on your chief.

- Come on!

- Who fucks an animal for their first time?

Son... haven't you served in the army?

70 percent of all Turkish men,

lose their virginity by f***ing an animal.

- Whoa!

- Make it more like 20 percent chief!

He's a city boy, this one.

I bet his daddy took him to a brothel.

Did he?

Nah. It was some senior students

in high school, who took us to one.

Dude, I'm seasoned with brothels,

whores, and whatnot, boy.

Let me tell you a story.

He already knows this one.

- What?

- The one with the string.

Listen to this one.

I was heading down from Maslak highway.

I saw this chick, right.

And what a chick she was!

She was like amazing!

She was... how should I put it?

What was that called...

Victoria's... Sectr- or whatever.

- You mean the Victoria's Secret models?

- Yes! She was like one of them.

So hard to find, yeah.

Anyways, I picked her up... driving.

You picked her up?

Just like that?

- What do you mean?

- You say Victoria's Secret.

A Victoria's Secret model

in your car!

- She was a whore, man.

- Oh... Ok. Go on.

I picked her up, driving.

She had a mini skirt on.

She was wearing a low-cut top,

earrings and everything.

She was gorgeous. Unbelievable.

Anyways. We arrived at the hotel,

we went upstairs to the room.

She started to get undressed.

She took off her skirt, the earrings.

She took off her high heels.

By the way, the room is dark.

And I was excited as hell.

I could hardly control myself.

She was so hot man!

Anyways. Finally,

I decided to make my move.

Slid my hand between the legs,

and there it was

a huge cock.

I was shocked,

and she laughed like you do now.

It was a cock man. A frigging cock!

- F*** off! How the hell?

- What do you mean "how"?

Look, there was a string.

She pulled it up to her belly

and tied the string rope around her waist.

- It was huge too.

- What did you do?

What could I have possibly done?

Since we were already there,

I went all the way.

But next thing you know...

While I was doing my thing

the son of a b*tch started

jerking off, while I do him!

I was like "what the f***!"

It was dirty enough as it is.

But she didn't stop.

I said "Cut that sh*t bro!"

So I'm pretty seasoned with

all kinds of this sh*t, boy.

Our religion teacher once said

it was awesome.

We asked him about anal sex right?

He replies:

"My son, why enter a shithole

when you have a rose garden next to it?"

Maybe I'm an ass man!

What do you care?

Our religion teacher also said

something very similar.

Do you prefer ass, Seyfi?

Yavuz, so, end of the day,

that woman gave it to your hand?

Stop it!

What if she'd said,

"Okay, my turn, bend over"?

- I have hemorrhoids.

- Wow! You mean you'd do it otherwise.

- That's right, he would.

- What's up, kiddo? Why are you laughing?

Sir, because you were laughing...

That's why.

- So, we entertained you with our jokes.

- No, sir, it's not like that.

- It was a funny story.

- What's so funny about it?

The woman turned out to be a man,

tying his junk.

- That's what I laughed at.

- So, you are saying that I f***ed a guy.

- I didn't mean it that way, sir.

- No, you did.

- Right? He said that I f***ed a guy.

- Yeah, Yavuz.

- He said that you f***ed a guy.

- Okay, Yavuz, okay.

- No way, sir.

- Are you calling me a f*ggot?

- No, sir. No way.

- Wait. Come back here.

- Yavuz, leave the kid alone.

- Wait a minute.

- Akif, come here.

- Remzi, wait a minute.

Step away.

Officer, the boy didn't mean it.

He's not a boy anymore.

He can defend himself, okay?

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