Baker's Man Page #2

---

because of the kids, you know?

But since I've started flossing,

I don't get the extra weight

that comes from the food

that comes out when you sleep.

I'm pretty sure that you're

not gonna gain weight

from the food

that comes out at night.

Oh, no, it's a thing.

I saw it on YouTube, so...

You know what, you can

just do that in the restroom.

I know, but I'm not

finished eating.

I just wanted to take

a halftime break,

clean my mouth out

before the big finish.

Got it.

I'm going back

for seconds later.

- You gonna eat that?

- No.

Oh, great.

I don't know why

the food is so good here.

Oh, my gosh!

Uh! Delicious!

I don't eat the croutons though,

'cause these are garlic.

You don't want garlic

in your hoo-ha,

make you stinky.

- You know what I mean?

- Got it.

Gross.

This is good.

And the chicken breast,

oh, my god.

The chicken breast, protein,

it's good for ya.

Mmm.

You know what, I think it's

time for my final floss.

Oh, great.

Perfect.

- I'm gonna... I'll be right back.

- Okay.

- Don't miss me too much.

- Hmm-mm, not at all.

Mmm, I just would like

a tall drink

of milk chocolate.

I'm gonna eat you up.

Oh, god.

Do you have a mirror

in your pants?

- I'm wearing a dress. -Because

I can see myself in there.

Oh. Okay.

You know, we should probably

just skip the dessert,

'cause I wanna climb

those pillars tonight.

Are you serious?

Wow, okay.

That doesn't work for you?

A friend of mine told me

that that would

totally seal the deal.

Hey!

Oh, my gosh!

This is my brother.

Wow.

Oh, my god.

We thought he died in Iraq.

Different dads.

- Oh.

- Yeah.

Um...

I'm gonna celebrate

my brother being alive.

So, thank you for this...

Whatever this was.

It was great.

I'm gonna call you.

Okay.

Sorry, I had

to get out of there.

No problem. Looks like

we both had a bad night.

Oh, right.

Oh, sorry about

the crouton thing.

I don't know what was going on.

It's okay.

I've been hit by worse.

Hi.

- I'll be right back.

- Thanks.

- Sorry to hear that.

- What?

You said you were hit

by, like, a man?

No.

I was at this pizza joint

one night, and I guess

they hired a new guy

to flip pizzas,

and he just flipped one

right into my face.

It's weird. Objects are

just attracted to my face.

That came off wrong.

Thomas?

Hi, baby, I heard

you were back in town.

I've been trying

to get a hold of you.

Uh, I really need

to talk to you.

Well, this isn't the time

or place for it.

Thomas, I know I hurt you.

Hurt me.

What do you want, Cori?

I just wanna say I'm sorry.

There is nothing

that I wouldn't do

to change the moment

when I walked out on you.

Well, as you can see,

I moved on.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes