Austin Powers in Goldmember Page #2

And I don't care who knows it.

Austin, this is my twin sister,

Her name Fook Yu. Fook Yu, Fook Mi. See

Twins??

Were going to see the twins.

I also think Austin Powers is very sexy.

We think you're very groovy baby.

Do we make you sleepy? Well you make me

many things but sleepy is not one of them.

We give you top secret massage.

Yes top secret massage, baby.

Sorry about that, I swear to god,

that never happens.

Hold on a tick. "Things to do before I die"

"Have threesome with Japanese twins".

Okay, now where were we babies?

Austin, I'm sorry to interrupt.

Twins Basil, twins.

Austin, it's your father. What? He's been kidnapped.

So that's why he wasn't at the knighting ceremony

No actually. He was kidnapped

after you were knighted.

He was last seen on his yacht. Oh, yes, the

"HMS Shag at Sea". Exactly, just take a look.

Gentlemen fall in. Austin, these men were

assigned to guard your father.

Okay chaps chins up, trousers down.

I think we might have found a clue.

Go Blimey. All your privates have had their

privates painted gold. How bizarre.

Imagine gilded tally wakers, golden

wedding tackle, 14 carat trouser snakes.

That's enough. Okay. Basil there's only one

person in the world who truly

Understands the psychology

of a mad man. Dr Evil.

"Maximum Security Facility Geneva".

I've been expecting you, Mr Powers. My father

is missing. Yes, I've heard. How ironic.

You finally caught me, yet now you need me

more then ever. But then again

You've always needed me

haven't you Mr Powers?

Remember when I told you, we are not so

different you and I?

We are not so different, you and I.

See, I did say that.

Very clever. Now who has my father?

Someone has some daddy issues. Nothing

could be my father from the truth.

You said my father. No, I dadn't,

didn't, did not.

For me this is a dad issue.

Dead... Daddy didn't love me.

It seems like the knighting ceremony wasn't

the only time your daddy let you down.

Remember that day at the academy?

Think! It was graduation.

"British Intelligence Academy 1958"

Have you ever heard of knocking, man?

-Right. We were just getting started.

Don't forget Mr Powers later

you have a brief oral exam.

Well I hope it's mostly oral and not to

brief, baby. You know brief and oral exam...

It looks like Master Evil is the top contender

for this years international man of mystery.

He's number 1 in the class.

Whoop dido Basil.

Hey, everybody I'm number 1.

Hello, I'm number 2.

Nice to meet you number 2.

But now I'm going to be named

international man of mystery

Who throws a cup cake? Honestly?

And now it's time to award our greatest honour

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