Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me Page #2

Her name is Unibrau.

Right on.

Welcome, Unibrau.

What?

A little milk...nose...mustache.

I know.

Meant to.

That's how we drink it

in Belgium.

Called a Belgian dip.

While you were frozen...

we began a program to clone you.

Cool.

Send in the clone!

He is exactly like you

in every way.

Except one eighth your size.

Breathtaking.

I shall call him...

Mini-Me.

Your stock is rising,

Number Two.

Come, Mr. Bigglesworth.

Mini-Me, are you hungry?

Something to eat?

Not even a Hot Pocket?

An Eggo?

No,we don't gnaw on our kitty.

Leave Mini-Mr. Bigglesworth

alone.

Just love him and stroke him.

As you know...

every diabolical scheme

that I have hatched...

has been thwarted

by Austin Powers.

And why is that,

ladies and gentlemen?

'Cause you never kill him

when you get the chance to...

and you're a big dope.

Down, Mini-Me.

Austin Powers always defeats me

because he has mojo.

Mojo?

The libido. The life force.

The essence. The right stuff.

What the French call

a certain...

I don't know what.

Ladies and gentlemen...

Ive developed a device

for traveling through time...

which I call a time machine.

Using this time machine...

Im going back to the Sixties

and steal Austin Powers' mojo.

If you have a time machine...

why not just go back

and kill Austin Powers...

when he's sitting

on the crapper or something?

How about no, Scott?

OK?

Why not use your knowledge

of the future...

to play the stock market?

We could make trillions.

Why make trillions

when we could make...

billions?

A trillion is more

than a billion, numnuts.

All right, zip it.

-You can't even--

-Zip it.

Zi-i-i-p.

Look, all Im--

Ladies and gentlemen

of the jury, ex-zip-it A.

Number Two,

would you please back me up?

-Look, Im Zippi Longstocking.

-l can't--

When a problem comes along

You must zip it

Zip it good.

Frau, would you please--

-Im just trying to--

-Zip.

Would you like to have

a suckle of my zipple?

-l want you--Stop--

-Zip.

Listen--All--You know--

You're like a child--

Talk in--If you--

Just--One time--

Zip it.

Unveil the time portal.

As you know...

Austin Powers

was frozen in 1967.

Therefore,

I will travel to 1969...

two years after he was frozen.

He'll be helpless.

Ladies and gentlemen...

Im about to travel

through time.

I bid you adieu.

Im OK.

Not turned on, I suppose.

Do you think you could...

Yeah, thanks.

Come, Mini-Me!

Don't be scared, Mini-Me.

Welcome to 1969.

Thank you, Number Two.

You look so healthy

and youthful.

Well, thank you.

Herr Doktor.

And Frau, you look so...

Right.

I received your memo

from the future.

Your new lair is up and running.

Is it a hollowed-out volcano

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