Anuvahood Page #2

- Booty spray. Ha-ha-ha-ha!

- Oh, my God!

- What?

- Uh!

Let it rain

Let it pour away

We won't come down

(TJ) Big Mike, blud!

He's a proper bad man, innit?

- One day, blud.

- One day, fam.

You've never even been round

to fix my flaming window!

You couldn't fix the crack in my arse!

Oh, I've had enough!

What ya mean? What ya mean?

Your mom

What ya mean? What ya mean?

Fat ting

What ya mean? What ya mean?

Slim ting...

What did I tell you

about this sh*t, man?

- Let me have a Fruitella, blud.

- No.

- Yo! K! All right!

- Just keep walking.

I ain't got time for this.

Blud, come on, hear me out. What

you saying, TJ? Are you cool, yeah?

- I'm cool, blud.

- Lend me a pound or something.

- I just bought a Magnum.

- You better run. Hey, listen!

- You owe me a tenner.

- I don't owe you nothing, man.

Hear me out, man! Real talk.

Real talk, fam.

Listen, I see your mum, innit?

Blud, don't talk about my mum.

- I see your mum in Netto's, fam.

- Shut up.

Listen. So, she was like

"What you saying, Craig?"

I was like "I'm cool, Pauline,

are you cool, yeah?"

Yeah. So, anyway, we's at the till,

right? And she started going like this.

Going this, you get me? No wallet!

No word of a lie, blud!

I'm telling you she had no wallet!

So, man like me,

I sponsored that rudeboy.

I sponsored that! You get me, fam?

She was like, afterwards, she said,

"Go and get your money from my son."

And I know. I know, fam. I know

you are the only son in the family.

You know that, innit? He told you, innit?

- Right, so you owe me a tenner.

- Oi! Shut the f*** up!

Always outside my house

making f***ing noise! You d*ckhead!

Just cos I'm some crackhead,

don't take me for a fool, you know!

Suck ya mom!

Oi! Taneesha! Oi! Where's my P?

Hey, blud, tell your dad

to allow it, man.

- I swear down that's not my dad, blud.

- Whatever, man.

Taneesha! Come on, Taneesha!

What we on, then, blud?

I don't know about you, blud,

but I'm going yard.

And, no, fam, you can't reach.

Brmm!

Oh, this is a real beauty, this one.

I can't wait to show Kenneth.

Looks lovely, darling. How about

you come and have something to eat?

I can't stop now.

Brian babe, you've been working all day.

You got to eat something.

I'm cooking your favourite,

spaghetti hoops.

Oh, you do spoil me.

All right, then. I love you.

- Love you too.

- Love you more.

- Love you more.

- I love you more.

- Wagwon, Mumsy.

- You're an idiot, Kenneth.

Oi, Mum man,

don't talk to me like that, man.

Seriously, Mum man, I told you

stop talking to me like that, innit?

What you wearing? Don't tell me

you actually walk around like that.

What? It's fashion, man. Swagger, innit?

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