And While We Were Here Page #2

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That's crazy. That's weird.

- Right?

- Yeah.

Vacation?

- Oh.

- Are you?

- What?

- Are you here on vacation?

Oh.

Sorry. I thought you were saying

you were on vacation.

Me? No.

So, come on.

My husband is working in Naples.

What does he do?

He is playing in a concert

at the end of the month.

Cool. What does he play?

Viola.

The viola.

He any good?

Yes. Very.

How do you keep your violin

from getting stolen?

You put it in a viola case. Right?

No, that's not funny.

What's the difference between

a viola and a coffin?

A coffin has a dead

person on the inside.

Cause viola players are dead. No?

Why is a viola solo like

premature ejaculation?

Because even though you

know it's coming...

there's nothing you can do about it.

I can't help it, I've got this weird

autistic mind for jokes...

and I went to this music/nerd summer camp

when I was like...

- 10 and I played the triangle.

- Right.

And I'm an only child, so...,

you know, understand.

You look too young to be married.

Are you a newlywed?

No.

No.

You're making me feel

like a stalker. F***.

All right.

Hey, have you got 50 cents?

If you can catch it.

What brought you out here today?

- The ferry.

- Ha! "The ferry."

I like it.

They have this device

down in the basement...

it's like a torture cage, they'd lock you

in there until you...

turned to bones.

But can you imagine dying by just sitting there?

That would suck.

In like the 1300s...

thousands of families

lived in this castle.

It must've smelled pretty bad.

All those people crammed onto this rock.

Wow.

I know.

I've been coming here every day

and it still gets me.

If only we could kill

off all the tourists.

You're a tourist.

No I'm not.

I came out here a few months ago...

with this volunteer organization

dedicated to studying...

the relic populations of dolphins

and whales in the gulf of Naples.

I can't tell if you're joking.

I'm dead f***in' serious.

No, I just didn't wanna go to college

and they pay for me to come over.

4 connecting flights, a 72 hour plane ride.

But, you know...

it was worth it. It was my

first time out of the U.S.

- How old are you?

- I'm 19.

It's my birthday today.

- Is it really?

- Uh-huh.

- Happy birthday.

- Thank you very much.

Yes, so, I left the program

after like a month.

F*** the relic dolphins!

I'm still on the island

because I have this...

this awesome living situation.

I'll tell you the short version.

Basically, I used to have

ancestors in Ischia.

So when I come over, I Facebooked this

second cousin twice removed.

A second cousin twice removed,

in case you didn't know...

is when one person's great-grandparent

is another person's...

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