All American Christmas Carol Page #3

Synopsis: Living for fun, shouldering no responsibilities and trolloping around in a drunken haze with any guy who'll have her, Cindy Wegman is trailer park trash through and through - so much so that when one of her kids' fathers dies and returns to herald the coming of three Christmas spirits to guide her towards redemption (ala Dickens' 'A Christmas Carol'), she only gets the trashy sort she deserves.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Ron Carlson
Production: August Heart Entertainment
  1 win.
 
IMDB:
4.6
NOT RATED
Year:
2013
88 min
Website
74 Views


SOCIAL SERVICES. IS YOUR MOMMY HOME? -NO! [ DOOR SLAMS ] [ SOLEMN MUSIC PLAYS ] -NO GUNS NO GLORY PAINTBALL

IS WHERE THE FUNERAL IS? -WELL, YOUR DADDY

HAD A ONE-TRACK MIND. -IS THAT WHY YOU NEVER MARRIED

HIM...'CAUSE OF PAINTBALL? -NO, I NEVER MARRIED HIM BECAUSE I WAS ONLY WITH HIM

ONE NIGHT, OKAY? I MEAN, MAYBE TWO,

BUT THAT'S NO REASON TO FALL IN LOVE

WITH SOMEBODY FOREVER. -WHOA!

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? -DANG TATER CAME FLYING OU OF THE SKY, DRILLED ME IN THE HEAD WHEN

I WAS RIDING DOWN THE HIGHWAY. -GEEZ.

-I'M OKAY. HOW YOU HOLDING UP? [ ENGINE REVS ] [ ENGINE SHUTS OFF ] -HEY, WAYNER. NICE BIKE, FOR A GIRL.

[ SNORTS ] -HEY, WHY DON'T YOU TWO BOYS,

UM, GO IN THERE? WHY DON'T YOU FIND YOUR

UNCLE BOB AND YOUR AUNT MARGE, AND WE'LL SEE YOU IN THERE?

YOU GOT HIM, WAYNE? -OKAY.

-OKAY. YEAH? SEE YOU GUYS IN THERE.

-LOVE YOU, MOM. -SEEN YOU ON TV LAST WEEK IN

THAT MATCH WITH THUNDER RAINS. LOOKING GOOD. -YOU SEEN MY SIGNATURE MOVE? -YEAH, I SAW IT. -[ SNIFFS ] -FLAG? MA'AM, FLAG

FOR OUR FALLEN BROTHER? FLAG? FLAG. -YOUR FAMILY RAISES THE BAR

FOR NEW LEVELS OF EMBARRASSMENT. -WHAT? IT...

IT'S PATRIOTIC. -BE CAREFUL WITH THAT. [ CLEARS THROAT ] -HOW YOU HOLDING UP THERE,

BUDDY? -I'M FINE. -I'M HERE FOR HIM, BOB. -DO WE HAVE TO LOOK

AT THE DEAD BODY? -NO. NO ONE IS LOOKING

AT A DEAD BODY TODAY. -[ SNEEZES ] -OKAY. DID YOU HEAR THAT? HE'S ALLERGIC

TO SOMETHING HERE. -MAYBE IT'S THE FLOWERS.

ARE THERE DAISIES? -[ SCOFFS ] WE'RE GONNA HAVE

TO GO NOW, BOB. -[ Chuckling ] I CANNOT LEAVE.

I JUST -- WHERE'S CINDY? -OH, SHE'S PROBABLY

NOT GONNA SHOW. -YOU KNOW, YOU STILL LOOK

LIKE A PIECE OF PIE JUST WAITING FOR A BIG LOAD

OF ICE CREAM TO TOP YOU OFF. SO WHAT'S UP WITH THE WAYNER?

HMM? -I DON'T KNOW. HE'S COOL,

AND HE TAKES GOOD CARE OF US. -YOU REALLY THINK YOU GOT A LIFE

WITH THIS COLLEGE BOY? -I DON'T KNOW. -IT'S LONELY ON TOP, CIND -- I MEAN, THE CIRCUIT. THE FANS,

THEY AIN'T ALWAYS KIND. -GIVE ME SOME TIME.

-DON'T! -YOUR MOUTH'S SAYING "DON'T," BUT YOUR BODY'S

SAYING "DON'T STOP." -WHY YOU TRYING

TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME WHEN I'M FEELING

ALL WEAK INSIDE? -YOU AIN'T WEAK. NOBODY HAS EVER TAKEN

ADVANTAGE OF YOU. IT'S ALWAYS

THE OTHER WAY AROUND. -THAT'S LIKE YOU TO SAY. -WHY DON'T YOU TAKE A HI OFF OF THAT? -[ INHALES DEEPLY ] -HI, THERE, PEEPERS. -PLEASE DON'T CALL HIM THAT. -IT'S A NICKNAME, MOM!

IT'S COOL! -YEAH, MARGE. IT'S COOL. -RATTAIL RANDY

IS A KICK-ASS NICKNAME. NICKNAMES ARE COOL. -DID YOU HEAR THAT, MOM --

KICK-ASS NICKNAME! -[SCOFFS] WOULD YOU PLEASE NOT USE LANGUAGE LIKE THA IN FRONT OF TIM? BOB! -YEAH. RANDY.

WATCH THE LANGUAGE. -[ SNEEZES ] -OKAY. WE'RE GONNA WAI IN THE CAR. COME ON. -BYE, HARLEY.

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Ron Carlson

Ron Carlson (born 1947) is an American novelist and short story writer. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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